


survive

by befham



Category: Arrow (TV 2012)
Genre: Attempted Rape/Non-Con, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Fem!Olivier Queen, Gender or Sex Swap, Genderbending, Older Man/Younger Woman, Rule 63, Violence
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-08-04
Updated: 2018-01-01
Packaged: 2018-04-13 00:22:04
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 18
Words: 23,619
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4500579
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/befham/pseuds/befham
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>“Well, maybe there’s a fighter inside of you after all, Olivia Queen.”</i>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> <b>Meet Olivia Queen, stranded on an island with Slade Wilson. It's going to be delicious.</b></p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So yeah. This happened.

Olivia clutches the map in her hand as she staggers towards the remains of a plane. Her lungs still burn from the water and each step is a struggle that makes her want to curl up on the floor and imagine that she is back at home with Laurel, Tommy and Thea.

But she makes herself take another step, all the while thinking survive.

Olivia stumbles into the plane, looking around wearily and sighing in relief when she finds it empty. She allows herself to relax slightly now that she has shelter, wondering why on earth Yao Fei would send her here. She sucks in a sharp breath when she notices a makeshift bed and she soon understands why.

Somebody's here.

Olivia curses Yao Fei under her breath and before she can even take a step something drops from the roof and lands with a thump behind her. A small scream erupts from her and before she can scramble away she is pulled back against a hard body and an honest to god sword is at her throat.

"Twitch, and I will open your throat," a harsh voice hisses in her ear.

"P-p-please don't kill me," Olivia gasps pathetically, but all of her pride has long since disappeared the moment she got stranded on this fucking island, and she is not above begging for her life. Tears sting in her eyes. She's tired and hurt and can't even begin to understand why everybody on this crack pot island wants to kill her. Because honestly, she doesn't deserve any of this whats so ever.

 _Don't you?_ whispers a voice in the back of her mind that sounds suspiciously like Laurel Lance. Her thoughts automatically switch to the other Lance sister. Sara Lance, the sweet girl who wanted to walk on the wild side with Olivia Queen and her endless parties and boy, died because of her. Despite Laurel's trust and their friendship, she had eagerly agreed to let the younger Lance sister come, not sparing a thought for what Laurel might think of it all. She thinks of her Dad, and the look of determination on his face as he pulled the trigger to end his own life so that she would be able to survive. And finally she thinks of her family, of her Mom's endless disappointment and Thea's sweet face. She thinks of the boys and the parties and the booze and the drugs.

Olivia is not a good person. She has known this for a long time.

But she does not deserve this.

"How many more are with you?" the voice demands, pressing the sword against her skin harder. Olivia cries out, but the man only presses down even harder.

"What?" she asks lamely, and this time she is unable to prevent the tears that fall. Her breath comes in short bursts and she's pretty sure that she's about to pass out judging by the black spots dancing before her eyes. "I-I don't know what you're talking about! Please-"

"You have ten seconds to tell me something I believe before I cut out your voice box," he says, his voice a rough husk in her ear.

"Wait! Please!" she sobs. "Yao Fei sent me here! Just let me go please-"

The man releases her, and Olivia falls to her knees from the force of it. She sucks in air greedily and warily rubs at the spot where the sword had been held against her throat. Looking up at her captor, Olivia flinches away from the sword still being pointed in her direction. He's huge, she thinks, her eyes lingering on the thick muscles of his arms. All lethal grace, ready to end her life with a flick of his wrist if he wished to do so.

"What?" he demands, his accent making him all the more terrifying.

"Yao Fei sent me," Olivia repeats. She remembers the crumpled up map in her hand and thrusts it out to him. The beast of a man looks down at her hand and she's pretty sure that he's seriously contemplating cutting it off so she says with a tinge of hysteria, "He gave me this map and told me to survive." The beast says nothing, just continues to look at her with unbelieving eyes.

She tries again. "He led me to you." Uncharacteristically, Olivia's cheeks burn as he lifts an eyebrow at her and if he was a less terrifying man, he would be smirking down at her. She lowers her eyes to the floor and whispers, "Well, your plane."

He snatches the map from her. Olivia flinches away from him and eyes the door with longing. She knows that there is no chance that she will be able to outrun this man, let alone fighting him. Peeking through her lashes, she looks at him as he studies the map so intensely that she shivers, for one absurd minute imaging him staring at her like that. His eyes flick up to hers and she quickly looks away.

Olivia runs her tongue over her cracked lips. "What's your name?" she asks softly.

He ignores her, his eyes glued to the the map in front of him. He slowly lowers his sword, but she daren't move.

"Get up." With great difficulty, Olivia pushes herself to her feet and stares down at the sword that the beast offers her dumbly. "Take it," he demands angrily. Olivia jumps and takes the sword awkwardly in her hand. And then he's on her, swinging his blade at her at an alarming speed.

"What are you doing?!" Olivia cries as she barely deflects a blow that would have cut her throat.

"Fight back."

Panic bubbles in her throat. "I can't-"

"Then you are of absolutely no use to me," he hisses as he swings his blade at her once more and with more speed that she thought she was capable of, Olivia flings herself back and manages to parry the the next blow he delivers. But then he lunges at her once again and her attempts to hold him off are all for naught as she falls to the ground with her sword just out of reach. Once again she finds herself with the sword to her throat.

"You have no strength, no training. You cannot help me."

"I'm not a soldier!" Olivia hisses right back, finally sick of this beast of a man who has done nothing but hurt her since the moment they had met. "I'm a party girl and nothing more! I was shipwrecked here and I have survived so far. You can't just give me a sword and expect me to fight you. I just want to go home."

Black eyes stare down at her without a trace of sympathy. "I need a soldier," he growls. "I need somebody who can fight. I need Yao Fei, but all he sent me was you."

Blinking back tears Olivia pleads. "Then train me. Turn me into a soldier-"

"There is not enough time." And then he presses the blade to her neck until a drop of blood travels down her neck. "And yet I cannot let you go."

Olivia's blood runs cold "No! Please. Whatever you are planning, I can help you-"

"I can make it quick and do it in a way so you shall feel no pain. I can't have you running around only to get captured and have you giving up my location."

"I-I won't say anything!"

"They will torture you. I'm doing you a favor here." He tilts his head then and says almost remorsefully, "It's nothing personal. I'm sorry, kid."

She doesn't know when she starts crying, but as she stares into those impossibly dark eyes, she wonders if maybe he's right. Maybe it would be better if she died right now. There would be no more hunger, no more pain and fighting tooth and nail just to get through the day. She would be at peace for the first time in her life. She has failed so many people, her mom, Thea, Laurel, Sara and her father. Her father who killed himself and his crew so that his daughter could live.

Perhaps embracing death would be easier. But she promised to right her father's wrongs, and she will not let her father's sacrifice be in vain.

_Survive._

Olivia lifts her leg hard and fast and kicks him right in the family jewels. Despite herself, she winces for the guy. Her executioner howls and acts like any other man who's had a kick to the groin. He drops to the floor, his eyes screwed shut and his sword long forgotten. Reaching for the blade with clumsy fingers, Olivia grasps hold of the hilt, scrambling to straddle her attackers chest and quickly puts the blade to the man's throat.

Brown eyes flip open and she feels a small spark of pleasure at the surprise in his eyes.

"I have no intention of dying on this island," she says, ignoring the way her voice shakes.

And then to her utter disbelief, he laughs. A deep rumbling laugh from the pit of his belly that makes her whole body shake on top of his. Seeming unconcerned by the blade at his throat, the man smirks up at her and offers her his hand. "Slade Wilson."

Staring at his hand in wonder, Olivia takes it before he can change his mind. "Olivia Queen."

"Well, maybe there's a fighter inside of you after all, Olivia Queen."


	2. Chapter 2

Slade Wilson is the most frustrating man she has ever had the displeasure of meeting. 

He treats her like a silly little girl (which arguably she is) and stubbornly calls her kid despite her numerous reminders that her name is Olivia. 

He forces her to hunt for her own food - _“I’m not a waiter, kid. This isn’t a five star holiday resort, get your own damn food.”_

He can barely hold a conversation, other than to remind her how useless she is and how easily it would be to kill her if she fucks up.

He treats her like a burden that he has been forced to bear, despite the fact that he needs her too. 

And then there is the unrelenting training. 

Hours and hours, day after day. 

It takes her less than a week to crack. All of the murderous glares and bitter smiles and being beaten to a pulp build up until-

“What am I supposed to do when one of Fryer’s guys jams a gun in my face huh? Hit them with my stick?” The look he gives her almost wants to make her back down but she is so fucking tired of being hit with a fucking stick and she just can’t do this anymore. Her body is bruised and battered and all she wants is to crawl into her sleeping bag and make Slade Wilson and his pointless bloody bamboo sticks disappear. 

Instead he pulls out a gun and hands it to her. “Jam this in my face,” he growls. Olivia hesitates, knowing that he’s about to make her eat her words. “Do it!” he demands, and so she does, and the next second she is flat on her ass with a gun pointing at her. Olivia struggles to her feet and sends Slade a filthy look. 

“This is pointless. I give up-”

Strong hands pull her close and there’s a gun being jammed into her face. “There is no giving up with these guys!” he growls, his eyes as hard as flint. “There’s no crying or begging your way out of trouble when you get captured. You have two choices. Escape or die. Choose now, Olivia.”

Anger burns through her veins and her cheeks are flamed in humiliation. “Who are you to talk to me like I am a misbehaving dog?” Olivia demands lowly. “I am Olivia Queen-”

Slade shakes her roughly and pulls her against his chest. The gun presses firmly against her temple and for an awful moment she thinks that this is the end, that he’s finally had enough of her whining and sulking and he’s just going to get rid of her himself. He glares down at her and growls, “I am the man who is going to get you off of this island, Olivia Queen. Without me, you are dead. Now choose, escape or die.”

Olivia glares right back at him with as much defiance as she can muster. “Escape,” she hisses.

“We have ten days until the supply plane lands, ten days to turn you into at least half a soldier. Stop being a brat and take this seriously,” he growls.

Olivia pushes him away with the little strength she has left - he doesn’t move an inch but the gun drops to his side. “I am taking this seriously! I already know how useless I am thanks to you reminding me every other minute. Stop standing there growling at me and actually help me for fucks sake!”

He drops the gun and pushes her away roughly, all the while glaring at her as if she is the worst thing in the world. Wordlessly, he holsters his gun and picks up the bamboo sticks and chucks her one. “Again,” he demands, waiting for her to make the first move. 

Olivia stares at him in disbelief. “Are you kidding?”

“Again.”

Swearing softly, she makes the first move, and ends up landing on her ass not minutes later.

Eventually they make their way back to the fuselage. Each step is torture and she is unable to prevent the groan that escapes her throat despite her best efforts to remain quiet. She can feel Slade’s amused glances staring holes into her back but she refuses to give him the satisfaction of seeing her pain with each simple movement of taking a step forward.

She hears a snort of laughter behind her and she has to bite her tongue to prevent herself from telling the oaf of a man to fuck off.

She hates him almost as much as she hates this island and Edward Fryers. But at the end of the day, she needs him to make it back home to her family, to carry out her dad’s last wish to save her city. 

And though she is loathed to admit it, Slade Wilson makes her feel safe, and she isn't willing to give that up.


	3. Chapter 3

“There’s a supply plane once every three months. If we don’t get on that plane tomorrow, then we are as good as dead.” His voice is matter of fact, as if their possible death is of no concern for him. In the dying light, Slade’s expression is set with a grim determination. He looks at her with hard eyes and for once he stares at her as though she is his equal.

Slade will take out the ten soldiers on the ground. Her job is to kill the man in the tower, a man who will have no opportunity to defend himself if all goes to plan. 

A man who she will have to murder if she wants to see her family ever again.

The fact that she doesn’t feel guilty about cold blooded murder terrifies her. But she has long since learned that it is kill or be killed on this island, and nothing is going to stop her from going home.

He mistakes her silence as hesitation. “Are you ready for this kid?”

“Yes,” Olivia replies grimly, staring into his eyes and willing him to believe in her for once. His dark eyes stare into hers so intensely that it makes her nervous, but she forces herself to remain still. After a moment Slade nods, seemingly pleased by what he’s found.

“Get some sleep,” he demands softly.

“Wait, you can fly a plane right?” she says, feeling foolish for only thinking of this now.

Slade’s mouth twitches into a smile. “Yes.”

Olivia smiles sardonically “Is there anything you can’t do?”

“Sing.”

She rolls her eyes and climbs into her cot. She is drifting off to sleep when he says, “Make no mistake kid. I will kill you if you prevent me from getting off of this island.”

Olivia turns away and rolls her eyes. Despite herself a small smile twitches on her lips. It is something that he says to her almost daily now, though she’s pretty sure that he doesn’t actually mean it anymore. In fact, she’s starting to think that she’s growing on him.

“Goodnight Slade,” Olivia calls, a small smile tugging at her lips as she succumbs to sleep.

\--

In the end it all goes to hell. 

She wakes to a heavy hand on her shoulder. “Rise and shine kid,” he says, turning away before she can mutter a good morning in his direction. There is no time to waste as he’s already gathering supplies and weapons for their mission before she even crawls out of her cot. He tosses her a backpack and he’s heading out without sparing her a glance. 

Despite herself Olivia pauses in the doorway to take in the fuselage. It was shelter, hell it was even home for a few short weeks. The place has become some kind of fucked up safe haven for her on this island, and though she would not miss it, she feels a pang in her heart as she steps out for what she hopes is the last time. 

Slade is silent as they hike. A confidence engulfs her and she’s really beginning to think that they can actually do this. She can see her family. Laurel and Tommy. Hell she will even be pleased to see Detective Lance at this point. 

All that is standing between them is a soldier in a tower.

And then she stands on a fucking mine.

“Oh God,” Olivia says shakily. Panic bubbles in her throat as Slade turns to her with wide eyes at the sound of the very distinctive click. 

“Don’t move.” He drops his backpack and approaches her cautiously, dropping to the ground at her feet. 

“Is it a mine?” 

Slade nods, his expression carefully blank

“Are you shitting me?” she hisses. “The soldiers mine the island?” 

His eyes meet hers for a moment and her stomach sinks.

He’s worried, she realizes with dread. 

“It’s Japanese, left over from World War II. It’s still active. Very impressive.” Slade gets to his feet and looks at her grimly.

“I’m going to die, aren’t I?” Olivia says softly, her voice breaking. She looks into his dark eyes and wishes that just this once he would soften towards her, say a kind word because right now she’s terrified. 

Slade opens his mouth but she will never know his reply as his eyes lock onto something over her shoulder. “Soldiers,” he hisses. He grabs the backpack from Olivia’s arms and tosses it over his shoulder. 

“Slade?” Olivia cries softly, her heart thumping loudly in her ears. He takes a few steps away from her, his eyes almost apologetic, and then he’s running away. 

“Wait!” she cries desperately. 

Tears sting her eyes as she hears voices grow louder and Slade’s gone. 

_He left me,_ she thinks in disbelief.

There is nothing to be done about it. If she moves to defend herself, the mine will explode guaranteeing certain death. Yet the soldiers will kill her where she stands. 

The soldiers see her, their voices halting as they take her in. “Isn’t that the girl?” one of them says in confusion. 

“Yao Fei killed her,” the other says. 

They circle around her like she is their prey, their eyes greedily taking her in. The man in front of her runs a gloved hand through her hair and her stomach drops. “It’s been a long time since I’ve touched a woman,” he breathes, his breath fanning against her cheek. She forces herself to breathe, to remain calm but then a hand is on her hip and sliding down to cup her ass. Olivia flinches away, the mine under her foot momentarily forgotten. 

“Don’t-”

Slade is on them before she can say another word. A war cry erupts from his throat and Olivia ducks. Blood splatters on her cheek as he makes his first kill, his sword slashing at the soldier’s throat with a grace she will never be able to possess.

_He’s beautiful,_ Olivia thinks with a surprising clarity. 

He makes quick work of the others and all she can do is clench her shaking hands together. He crouches down in front of her and stares at her with hard eyes. “Be still.” 

She can barely breathe let alone reply. And then his arms are circling around her and pushing them away from the mine. The air is knocked out of her as his heavy body lands on top of her and she waits for their certain death. 

Nothing happens.

A disbelieving laugh escapes her. Her shaking hands cling onto Slade’s shoulders as his unreadable eyes stare down at her. 

Slade pushes himself to his feet abruptly, and just like that she no longer wants to laugh.

“Thank you,” Olivia whispers shakily. For not leaving me. For rescuing me once more. Slade does not reply, he only holds out a hand to pull her up and drops it as soon as she is on her feet once more.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter may be a pile of shit to be honest with you. got the flu and spent the last few hours writing this and feeling sorry for myself. i may edit when i am better, but for now, enjoy.

They find shelter just as daylight fades into night. Olivia is exhausted, her body craves sleep and yet her mind can’t seem to stop playing the events of the afternoon over. The terrifying certainty that she was about to die. The look on Slade’s face as he realised that she was standing on a mine. His feigned betrayal as he walked away from her and the touch of the soldier who soon met Slade’s blade. 

But mostly she can’t stop thinking about how it felt to have Slade’s body pressed against hers. She has been deprived of a man’s touch for months, and to feel the hard bulk of a body on top of hers was a welcome comfort she hadn’t realised she had missed until Slade’s face was inches from her own. 

She’s never thought of him like that. He’s _Slade_. The man who can barely stand her presence, who calls her ‘kid’ all the damn time and was ready to kill her when they first met. He is a bastard of a man who doesn’t have a compassionate bone in his body. 

And yet in those few seconds he had been her savior, her protector. He could have walked away. Many others would have. Sure he would not have been able to carry out his plan with only one person, but he would have carried on surviving. But he didn’t. 

He put himself in danger for _her_.

“You should get some sleep. I’ll take first watch,” Slade says, his deep voice disturbing her thoughts. Olivia meets his intense eyes and appraises him with new eyes. Her cheeks warm despite herself, and she quickly turns away. 

She goes to put out the fire but Slade stops her. “Don’t. The fire keeps the wolves away.”

“There are wolves here?” Olivia replies in dread, imagining their ravenous teeth tearing into her warm flesh.

Slade only looks to her, but she can see the mirth in his eyes. 

“Right. Of course there are wolves on the worst place on earth. Let me guess, there’s also ten foot trancherlers too!” 

Slade smiles at her - actually _smiles_ without scorn - and replies, “I have yet to come across ten foot trancherlers.”

Olivia smiles back and looks into the fire. It’s in that moment that she realizes with a shock that she’s going to miss Slade Wilson and his mood swings if they do get off of this damn island.

\--

Briefly, she hesitates outside of the door, thinking of everything she has done to survive these last months in hell. This one man’s life is all that is standing in the way of her returning home. A man who is part of an organisation that has hunted her, tortured her and attempted to kill her from the moment she stepped foot on this island. 

The blade in her hand is steady. She is ready for this, ready to go home to her warm bed and her friends and family. 

And she wants to make Slade proud. She can do this, for herself and for him, so he can get back to his son and his life. If he can take out ten men to get home to his family, then she can kill one to get back to hers.

Clutching the knife tighter, she opens the door quietly, the guard too invested in his work to notice her. She creeps up behind him, quickly grabbing his hair and forcing his head back.

Olivia slits the guard’s throat before he can utter a single cry.

The guard’s lifeless body slumps across the desk. She waits for the guilt and remorse she had expected to feel, but instead she feels nothing. 

“I’m not sorry,” she whispers to the lifeless corpse. 

The door opens making her turn in surprise. Instinct has her scrambling for the gun in her belt and pointing it at the figure in the doorway. She breathes a sigh of relief when she recognises Slade and holsters the gun once more. She notices the surprise on his face as he takes in the dead guard, and she wonders if he had truly expected her to fail her part of the plan.

“You could have given me some warning. I could have shot you,” she says quietly. 

Slade lets out a bark of laughter. “You were too slow. I could have disarmed you before your finger twitched for the trigger.” He shakes his head and once more he is all business and heading for the door. “I’m going to scout the area, make sure that it’s clear. Shoot anybody who isn’t me.” 

“Hey Slade.” He turns, and Olivia smiles. “We’re going home.”

He smiles, one of those rare smiles that lights up his eyes. “Yeah kid, we are. But kid?” 

She clears her throat and takes a step forward. The way those dark eyes of his are fixed on her has her stomach aflutter. “Yes?”

”Try not to shoot yourself in the face,” he drawls with that sarcastic smirk. He’s out the door before she can bring herself to reply.

 _Oh._

The weight of the gun in her hand is reassuring, and though it goes against everything that Slade has trained her to do, she allows herself to relax, to think about home and returning to her mother and Thea. She can almost taste the welcome home dinner Raisia will cook for her, and she can almost hear the terrible music Tommy will play at her welcome home party.

And she can almost feel the crushing guilt that will burn inside of her when she lays eyes on Laurel and Detective Lance.

And just like that, her eyes land on a phone. 

A terrible longing for her mother overwhelms her in that moment, knowing that she is only days away from being with them once again. Without a thought, Olivia’s trembling fingers dials a number that she has known her entire life. 

She waits with baited breath. Her stomach plummets when a girlish voice answers the phone.

“Hello?” 

_Thea._

She covers her mouth to muffle the sob that escapes her. “Hello? Is anybody there?”

“ _Speedy?_ ” Olivia breathes. A laugh erupts from her throat. “Speedy it’s me,” Olivia cries into the phone, tears running down her face. “Listen to me, I’m alive-”

“Livy?”

The line goes dead.

“No!”

“Are you stupid? They could be monitoring the calls!” Slade growls furiously, tossing the now useless phone away. 

“My sister-”

“Enough!”

“No! You had no right to do that,” Olivia cries, for once not caring about being vulnerable in front of him. “That was my sister! You complete _dick _-”__

__“I’m trying to protect you,” he spits, unmoved by her tears. “From the moment you kicked me in the balls, all I have done is protect you from Fyers and yourself.”_ _

__“I never wanted your protection. I just want to go home,” Olivia hisses. “If you had the chance to talk to your son, you would have done the same.”_ _

__“Island tower, this is Skyhawk 801 Foxtrot, we are 700KM SE of your position, ETA three hours 23 minutes, over.”_ _

__Slade’s head snaps towards the radio, their argument completely forgotten. Olivia wipes at her eyes as he shoots her a look before saying into the radio, “Island tower, Skyhawk 801 Foxtrot acknowledged.”_ _

__“Of all creatures that breathe and move upon the earth.”_ _

__Slade looks at her blankly, and she shrugs her shoulders in return. “What?”_ _

__“It’s a challenge code to verify our identity.” He pauses, though she can see the panic mounting in his eyes. “Skyhawk 801 Foxtrot, please repeat.”_ _

__“Of all creatures that breathe and move upon the earth.”_ _

__Olivia’s eyes widen and she lets out a disbelieving laugh. Slade shoots her a filthy look. “What could possibly be funny?”_ _

__“I know this! I actually know this! They picked the one book that I read in college!” she says with growing excitement. “It’s a quote from The Odyssey. “Of all creatures that breathe and move upon the earth, nothing is bread that is weaker than man!”_ _

__Slade stares at her with wide eye. “Are you sure about this? Because if you are wrong this plane will turn back around-”_ _

__“Trust me,” Olivia begs. “For once, just trust me.”_ _

__He looks at her with unflinching eyes as he clicks on the radio. “Nothing is bread that is weaker than man.”_ _

__They wait with baited breath for what feels like an eternity._ _

__“Roger that, we will see you in a few hours,” comes the reply._ _

__Olivia lets out a squeal and throws herself into Slade’s arms. “We actually did it!” she cries, oblivious to Slade’s frozen form. “We’re going home!” She pulls away from him and laughs. “We’re going home,” she repeats in astonishment._ _

__Slade clears his throat, his intense eyes once more unreadable. “Well, in a few days, you will be off this island-”_ _

__“Wait,” she interrupts, her smile vanishing. “Why does it sound as though you’re not coming with me?”_ _

__Slade looks down at her with hard eyes. “I’ll be coming with you, after I radio in an airstrike on this location. I’m going to send Fyers and all of his men straight back to hell.”_ _


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There is an attempted rape in this chapter, nothing too graphic but if it's a trigger please don't read this chapter.

Olivia looks at him in disbelief. She knows that Slade Wilson is a killer. She has seen firsthand how quick he is to kill first and ask questions later. As a member of some Australian spy organisation, she knows that his body count is high, but for him to suggest blowing up an entire island is insane even for him.

“You can’t blow up the island. Yao Fei is still here. He’s your mission, the only reason that you’re here!”

“My mission is not of your concern,” he barks. “If you think that Edward Fyers is here by mistake then you are dumber than I thought. He’s a mercenary, and he’s got plans for this place that involve Yao Fei. This man tortured you, an innocent girl for no goddamn reason. Do you really want to see what he’s capable of?” Olivia glowers at him, though the memory of Billy Wintergreen’s blade slicing into her skin is burned into her brain. “This ends now.”

“I won’t let you,” Olivia snaps, although she knows that she stands no chance of stopping him physically. “He saved my life-”

“And that is your debt to repay, not mine,” Slade snaps.

Olivia pushes past him for the door but he wraps a hand around her arm and pulls her back to his side. “Take your hand off of me,” she snarls, attempting to shake off his hold but to no avail. 

“Where are you going?” he growls in her ear.

“To pay off a debt.” 

“You owe Yao Fei nothing.”

“Yes I do,” she says, willing him to understand. “All of my life, I have only thought about myself. My family, my friends, Tommy, they always came second. I took them all for granted, betrayed people that I loved. I don’t want to be that person anymore. I won’t leave Yao Fei here to die.”

Slade rolls his eyes impatiently. “Being a spoiled brat doesn’t make you a bad person kid,” he says. “Don’t get yourself killed over a man such as Yao Fei.”

“I have to do this,” Olivia says quietly, imploring him to understand.

Slade looks at her long and hard. “The plane leaves in three hours. If you’re not on it, then I will leave without you.”

She hesitates with one hand on the door. She can feel his eyes burning holes into her back and despite her instincts telling her to leave, she turns and meets his gaze. There are so many things that she wants to say to him, but instead all she says is, “If I don’t make it back in time, will you call my family?”

“Sure kid.”

\--

She gets caught.

Of course she fucking does. One of the very few times that she actually tries to be a better person, the universe comes and kicks her in the tits for it.

Olivia wakes with a pounding head, tied to a pole in a deserted tent. Thanks to the powerful blow to the head that Yao Fei gave her, it takes a moment for the room to stop spinning around her, though the urge to puke remains long after when she realizes just how fucked she is. She struggles against the zip tie binding her hands together, but it’s useless. 

She’s alone. Slade is no doubt stepping onto his plane right now without a second thought of the girl he has spent the last few weeks rescuing every time she fucks up, and Yao Fei-

Olivia sucks in a sharp breath.

Yao Fei had given her over to Fyers once again, and Olivia wonders if maybe she really is as stupid as Slade claims her to be to have trusted this man in the first place.

“I was beginning to regret ordering your death.” Olivia looks up. Edward Fyers stands before her, his booted feet centimeters from her knees.

She hadn’t even heard him come in. She shivers as she meets his cold eyes, and it’s then that she realizes that her jacket is missing.

“How are you still alive? I could have sworn I saw Yao Fei choke the life out of you.”

Olivia glowers at him hatefully. “I guess he’s not as strong as you think,” she spits.

Fyer’s mouth twitches. He pulls out a wicked knife from his belt and presses it to her throat.

 _I’m about to die,_ she thinks in horror. 

“Stand,” he demands. Olivia swallows painfully, and does as he commands. He steps closer to her and trails the knife down her chest, the sharp point gently caressing her exposed skin until he reaches her tank top. The knife slices through the material of her shirt, and it’s then that Olivia truly feels pure fear as she realizes just what Edward Fyer’s wants from her.

“You’re very beautiful,” Fyers says casually. He slips the knife back into his belt and pulls away her torn tank top until she stand before him in just her bra, and his greedy eyes take in her golden skin. He runs his cold fingers down her cheek, smiling in delight as she flinches away from him. “You see, Miss Queen, we have been on this island for a long time, and I had thought to give you to my men as a reward for all of their hard work when I came across you.”

He wraps a hand around her neck and thumbs her jaw. “Men do have needs after all,” he says thoughtfully. He tightens his grip on her neck making her cry out in shock. Despite her heart pounding in fear, Olivia sucks in a breath and does her best to glare at Fryers with every ounce of hatred she has for this man that burns in her body. 

Fyers moves his hand lower, his touch as gentle as a lovers, tracing the exposed skin of her collarbone. His cold eyes stare at her unflinchingly, lips curving into a cruel smile. Her breaths are quick as his hand slides lower and pausing to tease his thumb over the curve of her breast. He continues his descent, his hand leaving a trail of disgust and fury in it’s wake until his hand spans the skin of her stomach. 

“No,” Fyers breathes, his voice tight with need. “I think I will keep you for myself, Miss Queen.” He presses his erection against her hip and Olivia has to fight the urge to gag. “It’s been awhile since I’ve had the luxury of a woman’s embrace.” She is helpless against him as his hand slips under her jeans and tracing the cotton of her panties. Her hands struggle against the zip tie with renewed vigor. 

_“This is what happens when you play at being a hero, kid,”_ Slade would say.

But she’s not a hero.

She is a selfish girl who takes everyone for granted and was only trying to repay a debt to someone she believed a friend. She is somebody who has relied upon others from the moment she was born, and being on this island is no exception.

Olivia Queen is not a hero. She has no delusions about that. 

But nor will she be subjected to this man’s touch one second longer. 

“I am not a cruel man, Miss Queen,” Fyers is saying. “I will give you pleasure if you give me your obedience.” His fingers slip under the cotton and he is panting in her ear-

With all of her strength Olivia smashes her forehead into his nose. 

Fyers rears back with a cry of shock. Olivia kicks out with all of her strength and sends him flying to the floor. She pulls at her bindings once more until her wrists are burning but the pain makes no difference. Fyers is getting to his feet and his eyes blaze with a fury that would terrify the devil himself. With all of her strength, she gives one last pull of her bindings until her hands are slipping through-

Olivia throws herself at Fyers catching him by surprise and has them falling to the ground. She straddles his chest as his hands grab at her, but Olivia’s determined to end this once and for all as she grabs his head and smashes it into the ground with a sickening crack. Blood pools beneath his head, and from a distance she can hear guards entering the tent and them shouting at her to stand down but she’s too far gone. She curls her hands into fists and lands a blow that Slade would be proud of. Arms curl around her waist and then she’s being pulled away.

“I’m going to kill you,” Olivia hisses as she’s lifted away from him, though she fights with all of her strength against her captors arms. “You sick bastard!” Guards surround Fyers, and though she sees him being helped to his feet, she grins wickedly as she sees what she’s done to him. Fyers waves them all away impatiently, his raging eyes locked on hers. Though he’s unsteady on his feet, he strides towards her and punches her in the stomach.

“You useless bitch,” he sneers, fisting a hand in her hair and pulling her head back painfully. Olivia cries out and reaches back to claw at his hands but his hold is relentless. “I think that my men can have you after all,” he hisses in her ear, forcing her out of the tent despite her struggles.


	6. Chapter 6

The moment that she is gone, Slade is certain that she won't be back and he has finally gotten his wish that Olivia Queen would leave him alone and become someone else's problem. The moment she stepped through the door, she was walking to her death. 

Something in his gut twists uncomfortably at the thought. 

“Stupid, foolish little girl,” he spits out, curling his fists in anger. He closes his eyes and takes a deep breath. He is leaving this island, with or without her. He is not a sentimental man, but the thought of getting onto the plane alone makes his blood boil in anger at himself and at Olivia for putting them in this position. 

Yet he respects her for it, her stupid, naive decision to save a man that is far from deserving of her concern. It reminds him of a time when he was a green boy, determined to save the world and everyone in it no matter the cost. She has no business at playing hero with what little training she has.

The only way that he will ever see her again will be down to pure dumb luck, and so far, the kid has pretty much used up her quota by managing to survive for so long.

She is naive, but she is also brave.

The girl has been a pain in his ass the minute she stepped into the fuselage. He should have killed her. He had so many reasons to. She had no skills, no training. She was nothing but a thorn in his side. With Fyers and his men crawling every inch of the island, it was only a matter of time until she got herself caught, and she would easily give away his location under Billy’s talented hands. 

But the moment she kneed him in the balls and pressed a sword to his neck, he was hooked. 

She was a survivor, and that was something he could work with. 

His eyes flick to the clock.

They had time.

“Fucking hell,” Slade mutters, kicking out at the door in frustration because he knows what he’s about to do, and any self respect that lingered has just flown out of the window.

Slade forces his body out of the door and runs down the stairs, each step thundering in his wake. 

He was so close, so fucking close to leaving this hell hole.

Yao Fei be damned. The man was not his concern anymore, but Olivia, with her smart mouth and her trusting eyes, she was his to protect. He can’t step onto that plane without her by his side, not when she was the first person in years to put her trust in him. 

He remembers the look in her eyes as peered up at him in surprise when he saved her from the landmine yesterday, and her trusting eyes that stared over at him from across the fire hours later. He knows that he’s doing the right thing, even though it goes against all of his instincts to leave her to her fate.

He can’t leave her.

He picks up on her trail easily enough, and hopes that he isn’t too late.


	7. Chapter 7

A cry tears from her throat as Fyers throws Olivia to the ground. She lands on her hands and knees, mud splashing against her bare skin. The rain pours down around her, each drop of water like ice hitting her skin. She cannot suppress the shiver that tears through her as she struggles to catch her breath. Footsteps echo around her, and the rage that had come so easily in Fyers tent disappears as she forces herself to look up and takes in the amount of men surrounding her. 

She has no chance of escape.

Olivia swallows tightly, and struggles to her feet. Her hands slide in the mud, and the echo of the soldiers laughter will haunt her dreams for weeks to come. Tears prick her eyes, but she bites down on her tongue and forces herself to focus, to find a way out of this.

But she already knows that there isn’t one. Fyers has too many men, and she has no way of fighting her way out alone. She wishes desperately for Slade in that moment with his hard eyes and his cynical smiles. 

She wishes that she had listened to him.

Hard, greedy eyes stare at her exposed flesh, and it takes all of her self control not to cover herself against their hungry stares. 

“Tell me Miss Queen, do you regret your actions now?”

Olivia turns to Fyers. His eyes dance with a sadistic amusement as they stare at her. She curls her hands into fists wanting nothing more than to throw herself at him and to make him pay for every drop of misery he has put her through since she was washed ashore on this island. Her eyes linger on his broken nose, and a brief flare of satisfaction washes over her.

“No,” Olivia breathes out defiantly. 

Fyers smiles coldly. “We could have been allays, perhaps even friends, Miss Queen. Tell me where Slade Wilson is and I will not kill you once my men have had their fill of you.”

Olivia clenches her fists to stop them from shaking. Terror erupts in her belly, but she makes no move to answer. 

Laughter surrounds her, and for a brief moment she meets Yao Fei’s regretful eyes. Any hope that he would aid her once more flies out the window as he looks away from her gaze. She clenches her jaw firmly and once more meets Fyers eyes.

“Tell me, Miss Queen, are you simply a fool or do you see yourself as a hero?”

The laughter increases tenfold. “I am not a hero,” Olivia says steadily. 

“Then tell me where Wilson is.”

Olivia lifts her chin. “I’m not going to tell you where he is,” she says firmly, her voice strong despite how sick she feels. “You can torture me, rape me, do whatever your sick mind can conjure up, but I will not tell you where Slade Wilson is.”

There’s a long pause and then Fyers smiles terribly. “You are simply a fool then. Slade Wilson would not give you the same loyalty as you have so carelessly given him.”

Olivia does not reply, and though she does not know what Slade would do if their situation was reversed, she cannot help but remember the look in his eyes when he rescued her from the soldiers on the minefield and thinks that Fyers is wrong. 

“I really wish that you could have seen things my way,” Fyers says.

“I’m sorry,” Yao Fei says solemnly, but she does not pay him any heed. She stares at Fyers with a hatred she did not know she could feel for another human being. His eyes dance in mirth just as she feels a presence behind her.

Olivia turns slowly and meets Billy Wintergreen’s eyes. She can still feel his blade cutting into her skin in her dreams and the sadistic pleasure in his eyes as he heard her screams. “It’s Wintergreen, right?” Olivia asks. He strikes at her but she is too quick. Everything that Slade has taught her flicks through her mind, and though she knows that she has no chance against Slade’s former partner, she is quick on her feet and has an uncanny knack for talking her way out of trouble.

“Slade told me all about you, that you were his partner, his friend, the godfather to his kid.” Olivia manages to dodge his first blow, but his second hits her in the shoulder and has her staggering back. The mud has her struggling to keep her footing as the rain continues to fall around them. She sucks in a sharp breath and taunts, “You fought for your country, you used to stand for something. What happened to you that made you Fyers’ pet?”

Something flashes in Wintergreen’s eyes and this time he’s too quick for her. The first hit that Wintergreen lands makes her teeth rattle. The second has her seeing stars. By the third the world is lost to her entirely. Staggering forward, she feels arms wrap around her and turning her around, She feels his fingers fumbling at her bra and a hand cupping her breast. Her spinning head eases enough for her to struggle against him, his grip is unrelenting. 

Olivia lets out a snarl and snaps her head back against Wintergreen’s jaw. He loosens his hold on her enough for her to struggle free and lands a swift kick to Wintergreen’s rib cage that has him crashing to the ground. 

Olivia sucks in a ragged breath of relief, but it’s short lived as her legs get kicked out from under her. She lands on her back and is too shocked to cry out as a hard body crawls on top of her. Her body is pressed into the soft mud. Tears prick her eyes as she desperately struggles until a dagger is pressed against her neck. She forces herself to be still as his fingers travel to her jeans and whispers desperately, “Whatever he’s paying you, I’ll triple it.”

Wintergreen freezes.

And then everything explodes.

Wintergreen is suddenly gone and the men surrounding her start dropping like flies. The sound of gunshots is soothing to her as she scrambles to her feet. The soldiers start firing back at their unknown attacker as they run for cover and that’s when she sees him, his face contorted in a wild fury as he meets her eyes and taking in her state of undress. 

“Slade!” Wintergreen hisses. “Come to die?”

Slade turns to Wintergreen slowly and suddenly they are on one another.

Slade Wilson is like a storm at sea with brilliant flashes of temper like heat lightning. If she had any sense she would run for cover, but she is unable to tear her eyes away from Slade as he fights Wintergreen. He moves with a grace and swiftness that is almost unnatural for a man of his stature. He matches Wintergreen move for move, though both fight with the intention to kill. Her heart beats erratically against her chest, and just as he plunges his dagger into Wintergreen’s eye, she lets out a breath of relief.

His eyes meet hers, and then he’s at her side in an instant. There’s a slight pause as they stare at one another. She’s shivering from the cold and perhaps from shock. Slade’s hand slides into her own and finally she feels safe once more. She opens her mouth to say something, thank you, anything, but nothing comes out. Another explosion rocks them too close to home, and suddenly the moment’s over. Slade swears and he tugs at her hand and pulls her along to the safety of the trees, just as the supply plane flies over their heads. 

“No,” Olivia breathes.

“Better to be stuck here than dead, kid.”


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for the delay. i suck. but we're getting to the good stuff folks.

They stagger through the forest as daylight begins to fade, all the while Slade’s hand is firmly clasped in her own as he almost drags her away from the shit storm they have left in their wake. 

He does not say a word in protest as she tightens her grip every time she hears a noise behind them. Olivia turns at every sound, flinches at every noise until eventually Slade’s hand tightens around her own and brings them to a stop. Turning back to him, Olivia almost jumps at how close he is. 

She isn’t used to being this close to him unless he’s either beating the crap out of her in training or saving her life. 

“Easy,” he says, his voice a deep rumble in his chest. He lets go of her hand and places his own upon her shoulders. His eyes are hard and angry, for once she is pretty sure that his anger is not directed at her. “We’re safe.”

She believes him. She really does. But the memory of Fyers’ hands on her naked skin and the feel of Wintergreen’s fists hitting her over and over-

Olivia sucks in a sharp breath. Everything hurts. All of Slade’s lessons have been for nothing. All of those weeks of hard work, and all it amounted to was her dodging a couple of punches and getting her ass handed to her in a matter of seconds. 

Tears sting her eyes. She doesn’t deserve this. She is a spoiled, selfish girl, but she doesn’t deserve to be beaten and touched against her will. Almost _raped_ and all she wanted to do was repay a man who didn’t deserve her loyalty. 

She doesn’t deserve this. She should be at home with her family and Tommy and Laurel, not being attacked for doing the right thing for once in her pathetic life. She wants to curl up in a ball and will the world away.

But instead she takes a breath and blinks away her tears.

“I know,” she says, fighting the urge to add _because of you._ A tear escapes but she quickly brushes it away. “I know,” she says firmly, but it’s no good, the tears come anyway. Olivia turns her head away from his penetrating gaze but a firm hand on her cheek halts her. With far gentler hands than what she thought him capable of, Slade gently forces her to meet his gaze. 

“As long as I am with you, you will always be safe,” Slade says quietly, his eyes fixed firmly on hers. His thumb swipes away her tears and in that moment Olivia has never been more thankful to a person on this planet than she is to Slade Wilson. Olivia sucks in an uneven breath and forces herself to get a grip. After a few moments, his solid gaze calms her despite her fears. She forces herself to match his every breath, slowly breathing in and out. Her tears slowly stop until she is nothing but a sniffling mess, but Slade doesn’t seem to mind. He gently wipes her tears away and places his hands upon her shoulders once more and softly squeezes them.

Slade takes a step back, his eyes flicking down to her state of undress and clenches his jaw. He pulls a blanket from his backpack and throws it around her shoulders. It’s the best he can do, and she is grateful for the warmth against the evening chill, and it is a welcome distraction from his touch.

“I-I’m sorry. You missed the plane because of me-”

Slade’s mouth hardens into a firm line. “It was my choice,” is all he says. 

Olivia shakes her head. “You should have left-”

“No,” he says sharply. “No.” Olivia opens her mouth to protest but Slade’s already reaching for her hand and sharply tugs her along after him.

It is dark as they reach a cave, and she briefly wonders if it is the same one where Slade teased her about wolves only the previous night. It feels like years have passed, not one day. She’s exhausted, emotionally and physically and she wants nothing more than to sleep in her crappy cot at the fuselage but it seems that the cold hard ground is going to have to do. 

Her body aches from the beating it took as she slowly sinks to the ground. Lost in her thoughts, she pays no mind to Slade as he sets up camp and gets a fire going. 

Staring into the fire, Olivia sits stiffly, ignoring Slade’s quick glances he shoots her way. She can’t stand to see the pity he will now look upon her with, and her earlier melt down is too fresh in her memory. A part of her feels embarrassed that Slade Wilson, a man who is always so stoic and strong, saw her so vulnerable and fragile. 

But a far larger part is so grateful to him for saving her life once more.

“Thank you,” Olivia says quietly, breaking the silence at last. Slade does not reply, but she can feel his dark eyes staring at her.

“I won’t be a victim again,” she says with grim determination. Meeting his gaze head on, it surprises her and then empowers her to see a newfound respect in his eyes. 

“You’re not a victim. You never have been. You’re a survivor. I knew it from the moment you kicked me in the balls and pressed my own damn sword to my neck.” A small, proud smile tugs at his lips, and Olivia feels something flutter deep in her belly.

Olivia smiles. “I can’t believe that a kick in the nuts is what brought down the mighty Slade Wilson.” Slade barks out a laugh, but it quickly dies away as she demands, “Why didn’t you leave?”

There’s a long moment of silence. He looks at her for a long moment with steady eyes and just as she’s beginning to regret asking the damn question he replies simply, “We’re partners.”


	9. Chapter 9

Olivia trains hard. Each day she pushes her body to it’s limit from the moment the sun rises until she collapses into her cot each night in an exhausted heap. Her muscles ache and burn with every movement, but she pushes through it, eager to learn everything that Slade is willing to teach her so that she will never have to rely on a man saving her ever again.

Weeks pass by without any sign of Fyers’ men. They eventually get into a routine. Every morning at dawn, Olivia runs, more often than not with Slade by her side, pushing her to go farther and faster each day. 

She still has to swallow the urge to tell him to fuck off most days, but she knows he’s only pushing her because he cares, even if he isn’t prepared to admit it. But he does care. He gave up his chance to get off the island to rescue her, and she’s pretty sure that Slade Wilson isn’t the kind of man to give up that opportunity for just anyone. 

“So what now?” she asks eventually one evening, curious to know his plan because she knows him too well by now to know that he has one.

“We survive,” he replies, shooting her a look that says she’s a fucking idiot for even asking.

Olivia swallows down her childish retort and instead forces herself to say. “What, you plan on spending the rest of your days here?”

Slade huffs in indignation. “Kid, we have no way off right now. Hopefully my fireworks show has set back Fyers enough that his employer will call his whole operation off.”

“His employer?” Olivia asks curiously. In all this time, she has never actually stopped to think what Fyers was hoping to achieve.

“The man’s a mercenary,” Slade mutters distractedly, his attention focused on sharpening his knife. “We need to survive until a new way comes along to get off the island. Our chances are far higher if you know how to handle yourself.”

“I thought that you said if we didn’t get on that plane we would die here,” Olivia says quietly.

Slade looks up at her then, his dark eyes appraising her. “That dumb kid that I trained wouldn’t have stood a chance. The woman that stands before me now, well, she stands a chance.”

She smiles for the first time in weeks, and it doesn’t leave her face until she falls asleep.

He takes to sparing without a shirt on. She can’t help but stare at him, the solid bulk of his chest, the smooth muscle interrupted my scars old and new. He makes her blood boil so hot she thinks she will explode somedays. The rare moments he lets down his guard and his eyes look at her with warmth and what she thinks is affection. 

But damn, it’s one hell of a distraction.

She ends up in the dirt every time, but each time she goes toe to toe with Slade, she lasts a little longer every time. 

Until eventually, Olivia ducks his blow and hits Slade in the back of the knee causing his leg to give out.

“You’re improving,” he says, his accent thick as he looks up at her proudly. Olivia pushes down the urge to grin like a maniac and shout hallelujah and instead sends him a small smile. 

“You’re a good teacher.” Slade barks out a laugh and holds out a hand for her to pull him up. 

She pulls him up, her muscles protesting after their vigorous sparring. An excited smile is plastered on her face. “What now?” she demands eagerly, feeling far too confident with her surprising victory. 

“Weapons,” he replies, suddenly back to business. He hands her a knife, and shifts his body. Olivia copies his hold and his stance and waits with bated breath.

“Knives are intimate weapons,” Slade says as he steps closer once he’s inspected her form. He’s all business, but like every other time he is so close to her, Olivia finds it hard to concentrate. “Unlike a sword, you’re in a close-range combat with your enemy.” Slade holds out his hand expectantly, and it takes a few seconds too long for Olivia to realise that he is waiting for the knife. She places the knife in his palm gingerly. 

Slade twists the blade’s tip around and around on the soft pad of his thumb before wrapping his long fingers around the hilt.

Then he steps up close, far too close for comfort in Olivia’s opinion. Slade presses the blade against Olivia’s throat, the sharp metal almost cutting into her skin. “The most obvious place to cut is a man’s throat, or perhaps even under his chin. They’re effective, but you can’t rely on them as you’re only point of entry.” 

Olivia swallows tightly as Slade drags the tip of his knife down the vulnerable slope of her neck and across her shoulder. “If you stab a man’s armpit, you will incapacitate the arm.” The knife dragged further down until it tapped against her leg. “Strike the groin of the inside of the thigh, and you will hit a vital artery that will have your enemy bleeding out in seconds.”

Slade let out a breath that has Olivia’s eyes snapping up to seek his, but his gaze is locked firmly on the knife as it trails up Olivia’s front like a lover’s unhurried touch. Olivia shudders as her mouth goes dry. “The belly is a slow death, but it won’t immediately stop a man,” Slade says, his voice lower than normal. “It takes a lot of strength to drive a blade into a man’s chest, and with a short blade such as this, you don’t have the strength to penetrate the ribs to puncture the heart of lungs.” 

Slade abruptly steps back and hands her the knife once more. It takes all of her self control not to step after him. “Come on kid, show me what you’ve learned.”


	10. Chapter 10

It takes her days to get used to the knife in her hand, and weeks for Olivia to even find an opening in Slade’s meticulous defences. He’s too fast and too strong. A few weeks ago she would have given up and chucked the knife at his stupid face and stormed off. Now she pushes herself until she is quicker than him. She will never be able to beat him with her strength, but with speed, she has a chance. 

Their latest training session starts out the same. It’s not until they’re about to pack up and head home when she manages to get the drop on Slade by pressing her knife into his thigh and just as she’s about to drive the knife home, Slade captures her wrist and squeezes so hard until she drops the knife with a cry. She lunges after it but Slade drags her back and spins her around so that her back is to his chest. Slade wraps an arm tightly around her struggling body as she tries to escape. With a gasp she manages to free her arm and catches Slade’s arm just before he can press his knife to her throat.

But it’s no use, he is far too strong as he moves the blade closer and closer. Olivia grits her teeth as she uses every bit of her strength to hold him back. Scrambling for a way out, she curses herself. She had been so close to finally beating him. She forces herself to remember everything Slade had told her after every one of her defeats, but only one thing comes to mind.

_“You’re too small to beat a man of my size if you rely on strength alone. You will have to be smart and quick, kid. Anything around you can be a weapon. Use everything at your disposal.”_

Olivia leans forward sinks her teeth into his hand so hard she can taste blood. Slade sucks in a sharp breath behind her but he doesn’t drop the knife, he only loosens his grip. Not giving him time to recover, Olivia throws her head back and smashes her head into his chin, once and then twice until he’s letting go of her. Olivia kicks him in the back of his knee and Slade falls to the ground, his knife falling from his hand as he goes. Slade fumbles for his fallen knife but Olivia is too quick as she kicks it away and climbs on top of him as he already trying to get up. She reaches into her boot and quickly presses the blade of her knife to Slade’s throat.

“You’re dead,” she says softly, struggling to catch her breath as Slade still beneath her. An astonished laugh escapes her as it finally dawns on her. She’s beaten him. She’s actually beaten him!

“Since when do you keep a knife in your boot?” Slade demands incredulously.

“Since you told me to be smart,” Olivia replies, the surprised look on his face just making her laugh harder. “I actually beat you!” She finally tucks her knife back in her boot and smiles widely.

Slade looks at her and slowly smiles. The look he gives her thrills her as she realises that he’s actually proud of her. He opens his mouth and she’s unprepared for what he says. “I’ve never heard you laugh.”

Olivia smiles shyly and looks down. “I haven’t had a lot to laugh about recently,” she says quietly. Meeting his gaze head on once more, it dawns on her that she’s actually straddling Slade Wilson right now. Looking into his eyes, the look he’s giving her makes her want to lean down and capture his lips, but all she does is clear her throat and climbs to her feet. She turns away to see the sun set as Slade gets to his feet and when she turns back he’s back to his normal stoic self with his emotions carefully concealed behind an impenetrable wall.

“It’s getting dark,” Slade says, his voice gruff with something Olivia can’t name. “We should head back.” He turns and walks away before she can even open her mouth to reply.

The short walk back to the fuselage is silent and tense. She’s pretty sure that she’s never felt so awkward in her entire life. Her eyes do not leave Slade’s back as he leads her back home, and when they get there, he acts as though he’s invisible. He busies himself with unlacing his boots and strips his gear. The sight of Slade’s naked chest is something she has become used to over the past weeks, though it does cause her breath to catch in her throat.

There’s been men. A lot of men. But compared to Slade, every one of them were boys. Slade is one hundred percent all man. From the wide set of his shoulders to the ripple of his muscles with his every movement. He’s lived and experienced so much, he is so much more than the boys she used to entertain herself with.

With one look she could get any man she wanted to entertain herself for the night. But with Slade, everything has been different since the beginning. He didn’t fall over himself to get her attention so that he could spend a night with the Princess of Starling City. Slade calls her out when she’s being a brat and he refuses to take any of her bullshit. Instead of protecting her and treating her like a delicate flower, he teaches her to protect herself. He pushes her to better herself everyday. 

Perhaps most importantly, he’s taught her to survive the impossible.

Whatever he feels for her - and she refuses to believe that this is one sided - he fights it. And she’s bloody tired of it. 

“What’s crawled up your ass and died?” Olivia snaps.

Slade freezes at her words. He drops his top and slowly turns towards her. “What?” Slade growls, finally looking at her. All traces of his soft eyes and proud smile are gone and instead he’s looking at her as though she’s a stranger.

Fuck that.

“One minute you’re all proud and nice and then the next you’re acting like I’ve killed your dog. What’s going on?”

Slade draws himself to his full height and glares down at her. He steps closer to her, looking down at her where he stood within her shadow. Their gazes lock. She does not back away as she would have all those weeks ago when they had first met. Instead she steps closer, so close that she can feel the heat from his body as he stares down at her with solemn eyes. Olivia tilts her head up, and his mouth is close enough to kiss. Slowly, she raises a hand between them to touch his bare chest, and his heart is beating erratically beneath her hand. They share a breath, and just as Olivia leans in, Slade turns his head away.

“Slade please-”

“You should sleep,” he says, his voice hard as he steps away from her and picks up his shirt. She’s having none of it though as she follows him. 

“Dammit will you just listen to me? Stop playing this off!”

“Look kid, we’re not doing this-”

“I’m not a kid! I’m an adult and it’s about time that you treat me like one. Don’t try to make this into an age thing.”

“Listen kid,” he sighs, sounding every bit as pissed off as she does. “You’re just feeling like this because I’m the only guy around here. I’ve protected you and that’s bound to cause some feelings that have confused you.”

“This isn’t some pathetic crush because you’re the only man around here who hasn’t tried to kill me or rape me,” Olivia snaps. “There’s something going on between us, and you know it. If you don’t believe that what we’ve been doing here means something then you’re a liar. You’re lying to me, but you’re lying to yourself too.”

“I don’t feel the same way,” Slade growls. “You’re too young for me, and right now, getting laid isn’t high on my list of priorities. We don’t need distractions. That’s what gets you killed.”

Olivia flinches away from him. _A distraction?_ It’s like a slap to the face. Does he honestly think that she would risk their already shaky relationship for a quick fuck? Olivia clenches her jaw. 

“I don’t believe you,” she whispers. “We’re stronger together than apart. I truly believe that. But you don’t, do you? You were quite happy to go it alone before I showed up and became a burden. You look at me and see a dead girl, don’t you?” Olivia says, her voice tight with tears. She waits for him to contradict her, but his silence says it all. He looks away as a tear escapes. She’s so fucking weak. Brushing it away, she says softly, “That’s why you won’t let yourself fall for me. Well, let me tell you something Slade Wilson. I’m going to prove you wrong.”

She turns away but he catches her hand before she can escape. “Olivia this is for the best-”

“Just don’t,” Olivia says in defeat. She snatches her hand out of his and climbs into bed. She makes sure to turn her back towards him as she finally lets herself cry for what she’s lost and for what will never be.


	11. Chapter 11

She wakes long before the sunrise and carefully gets out of her makeshift bed. With a quick glance to assure that Slade is still asleep, she strips and pulls on her worn jeans and a vest that she had stolen off of Slade after her constant whining of not having any clothes. 

Her movements are careful as she reaches for her backpack and packs up her meagre belongings. Waking Slade and being forced to confront their awkward situation was not on her to do list today - or ever. She refuses to subject herself to another humiliating experience of being told that she is just a spoilt little girl with an inconvenient crush. She is Olivia Queen for fucks sake. Men in Starling City would sell their first born for a kiss from her.

But not Slade Wilson. 

Well. Fuck him. Fuck him and his protection and his lessons and his fucking brooding. She’s done. Being alone works far better for her, and after his brutal methods of teaching, she’s pretty sure that she can handle anything that comes her way. She doesn’t need him, and he made it very clear that he doesn’t need her.

Doing her best to be silent, Olivia slowly creeps over to Slade’s chest and opens it. It still surprises her how much weaponry he possesses. She picks out a 9mm and carefully loads it, still wary of the thing despite how familiar it has come to feel in her hand. Tucking it into the waistband of her jeans, she ignores the stab of guilt for taking Slade’s supplies and takes two boxes of ammo and places them in her backpack. Surely he would rather lose a gun and some ammo than spend another day with her and her inconvenient feelings.

Straightening her spine, Olivia clenches her jaw and slowly shuts the chest. Her time with Slade has to come to an end, for both of their sakes. She refuses to live in such close quarters with a man who sees her as nothing more than a child he needs to protect, and she can’t stand to be around the one man she can’t have any longer.

Perhaps she had been that girl when they first met. But now she is so much more. She's a soldier, a killer, a survivor. And it's all because of him.

Turning towards Slades bed, Olivia takes a step closer and swallows tightly as she takes in his peaceful face. It is the one and only time she has seen him look so at peace. There are so many things that she wants to say to him, but all she can muster up is a whispered, “Thank you.” 

Forcing herself to turn away, Olivia throws on her jacket and picks up her backpack, and with one final glance at Slade’s peaceful face, she leaves the one place where she has felt safe in months.

Without any other plan other than to get away from Slade and not dying, she walks for what feels like hours. It takes her a long time to realise that she’s being followed, but she does not acknowledge him until he decides to make his presence known.

“What the fuck are you doing?” he growls. 

“Getting away from you,” Olivia snaps, not bothering to turn around. 

“You’re being ridiculous,” Slade seethes, hooking his hand around her arm and forcing her to stop. Olivia struggles to free herself but it’s useless, he is far too strong. 

“Save it. I wouldn’t want to be a distraction for you. This is for the best,” she hisses.

“Kid, come on.”

Olivia laughs bitterly, angry tears stinging her eyes. “What do you expect of a spoilt brat?”

“Let’s go back to the fuselage, and sort it out-”

“I’m not going anywhere with you!” Slade’s grip on her arm loosens and Olivia takes the opportunity to wrench herself away from him. She takes several steps back but Slade just matches her move for move.

“I’m doing this to protect you!” he growls, his voice tight with frustration.

“The only person I need protecting from right now is you!”

Slade clenches his jaw and in a slightly softer voice he says, “Our main priority is to get off of the island. Us being together is only going to distract us from that. Don’t you see?”

“No, don’t you see Slade?” Olivia cries, swiping at a stray tear. “What if we never leave? What if this is it for us? We could die tomorrow or in fifty years time. Do you honestly want to die knowing that you spent your final days being too afraid to live for something other than survival? I can’t live like that. I won’t.”

“What I want doesn’t matter!” Slade snarls. He grabs the tops of her arms roughly and gives her a little shake. Olivia flinches away from him in surprise. “What I feel doesn't matter! I'm going to get us off of this island and you can go back to your life with your family and friends and men your own age. Now turn your ass back around and get back home.”

“I'm not going back,” Olivia says, the strength in her voice surprising her.

“Yes you are. You're going even if I have to throw you over my shoulder and tie you to a fucking chair for a week until you get this idea out of your head. You're going.”

“You wouldn't dare,” Olivia snarls, taking a step closer and glaring at him with scornful eyes. 

“Try me,” Slade growls, his whole form towering over her. 

Olivia opens her mouth to argue, but a sudden snap of a stick fills the eerily quiet forest around them, and suddenly Slade’s turning, his gun already in hand, but it doesn’t matter how quick he is because this time he isn’t quick enough. “No!” Olivia cries. There is nothing she can do except reach for her own gun far quicker that she ever thought herself capable of as a bullet tears through Slade’s shoulder, and the strongest, the bravest, the most indestructible man she has ever met cries out, and falls to the ground at her feet. 

For a split second, Olivia is frozen, her terrified eyes fixed firmly on Slade's too still body. Then she remembers everything that Slade has ever taught her, and what he would have to say if she got shot too because she was too busy freaking out. Though it kills her to do it, she forces her gaze away from Slade and swings her eyes around until she finds the mercenary whose gun is cocked firmly at her. He smiles, a harsh, ugly twist of his mouth. Olivia shivers, recognising the man immediately from the group of men who cheered and leered at her half naked body as Billy Wintergreen drove his fist into her cheek. 

“Fyers has been looking everywhere for you-”

Olivia lifts her gun and pulls the trigger without hesitation, shooting him right in the gut. A chill goes through her as she sprints to her fallen victim who is already reaching for his gun with a shaking hand. Olivia kicks it away and aims her own gun firmly between his eyes. The mercenary sucks in rattling breaths and pleads, "N-no! Please! I have a family-" 

Olivia smiles sweetly and replies, "As do I, and you just shot a member of mine." Olivia pulls the trigger.


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I know. Two chapters in two days? Wtf is going on with the world?! In case you haven't already, make sure you read the previous one.

Olivia carefully scans the forest but all remains still. Her heart is pounding against her chest, and though she aches to check on Slade, she cannot afford to be caught unaware again. She’s certain that the bastard was alone. If he had backup then they would have had the perfect opportunity to kill her by now. 

 

She curses herself. This is her fault.  _ Again. _

 

If she hadn’t of run off Slade would be safe and not possibly bleeding out on cold ground in this stupid forest. She’s everything that he’s said she is. An impulsive spoilt brat that doesn’t think about the consequences of her actions. If she had only stayed and worked through their awkward situation then none of this would have happened. Instead she did what she wanted and somebody has gotten hurt because of her  _ again _ .

 

_ Sara, her dad, her mom, Thea, Tommy, Laurel, Mr Lance. _ And now Slade. Tears sting her eyes. She didn't mean for any of this to happen. People die because of her. But she will be damned if she let's Slade be one of them.

 

She puts the gun in the waistband of her battered jeans and runs back to Slade. Falling to her knees, Olivia bites her lip to stop the sob that threatens to tear through her throat as she notices his shallow breathing. There’s so much blood. With shaking hands, she quickly takes off her jacket and pulls her vest over her head. She presses it to the wound and puts pressure on it. She has no idea if she’s doing the right thing but she’s pretty sure that she saw it in a movie once.

 

“Oh my God please don’t die!” she whispers in panic as the material blooms red.

 

“I’m not going to die,” Slade grits out, and Olivia has to swallow her scream. He groans and sucks in a labored breath. “Are you hurt?”

 

Olivia shakes her head. “Don’t worry about me. Tell me what to do.”

 

Forcing his eyes open, Slade blinks and struggles to focus on her. “The shooter?”

 

“He’s dead,” Olivia spits.

 

Slade looks at her, his eyes hardening. “Ease up on the pressure. I’m fine.”

 

“You’re not fine! You were just shot!”

 

“In the shoulder. Nowhere important.” Slade clenches his teeth and slowly sits up.

 

“What are you doing?! Stay still!”

 

Slade groans, a harsh guttural sound that has her on edge. “We can’t stay here. There could be more of them,” he says shortly. With gentle hands he pushes hers away and slowly pulls her vest away. He hisses, but Olivia is far too preoccupied with his blood staining her hands. It’s a sight she never wants to see again. “The bullet’s still inside of me. You’re going to have to - where are your clothes?”

 

Olivia frowns in confusion and quickly looks down at herself and immediately flushes. Her top half is completely bare apart from her bra. She scrambles for her coat thanking every deity that she knew that she had at least put it on this morning. Cheeks burning, she does not look at him as she puts it back on. “I needed something to control the bleeding,” she says defensively. 

 

Slade does not reply, but he turns away from her and forces himself to stand. It startles her when she notices how pale he is. “Get your gun ready. We’re heading back to the fuselage.”

 

“We must be miles away from there-”

 

“Then we had better start moving.”

 

\--

 

It takes hours to get back to the fuselage. They encounter nobody, and despite her pleas for him to slow down, Slade plowed on, only accepting her help when he could walk unaided any longer. By the time they’re back home, her whole body aches from holding him up, though she doesn’t spare a thought for that when she finally gets a good look at Slade as he slides gracelessly into a chair..

 

He looks terrible. His jacket is saturated in blood, his normally tanned skin has a pale, sickly hue to it, and his shallow breaths fill the fuselage. Ignoring his protests, Olivia helps him out of his gear, her stomach twisting into knots at the sound of his pained groans. Her eyes land on the hole piercing his skin and she fails to hide her wince.

 

“Tie me up,” Slade says tightly, holding his hands behind his back.

 

“What?” Completely thrown by his words, Olivia whirls around and looks at him incredulously. 

 

“Tie me up. I can’t promise that I won’t hurt you.”

 

“Why would you hurt me?”

 

“There’s a bullet lodged in my shoulder. You’re going to have to dig it out.”

 

Bile rises in her throat. “No. I can’t-”

 

“Yes you can,” he snaps. He closes his eyes and lets out a pained breath. When he looks back at her, his eyes are tight with pain and something she can’t quite name. “Listen kid. I’m in pain. I need you to do this.”

 

Forcing herself to swallow back any protestations, Olivia slowly nods. Slade relaxes a tad and tilts his chin towards his chest of armory. “There should be some rope in there.”

 

She follows his orders, terrified beyond belief about what is to come, but as she picks up the rope a thought comes to mind. Olivia stares at the rope in her hands and back up at him. “Wait, why do you even have rope lying around here? What did you and Billy Wintergreen get up to all alone on those winter nights-”

 

“Olivia,” he snaps impatiently. Hiding a smile, she ties the rope around his wrists as tightly as she can. 

 

“Alright?” she asks softly. 

 

Slade tests his newly bound hands and gives her a firm nod. “Use your knife,” he growls.

 

Swallowing back bile, Olivia Picks up the knife and gently digs the sharp tip into his wound.

 

Slade grits his teeth, not a sound of pain slipping out as she digs around for the bullet. His muscles bulge as he tenses with her every movement. She works quickly, eager for this to be over and just as she begins to think that this is hopeless, she feels the knife scraping against something which she hopes to God isn’t his bone. 

 

“It’s out!” Olivia squeals, dropping the bullet onto the floor as quickly as possible. She uses the knife to cut the rope around Slade’s hands with shaking fingers and gingerly lays it on the chest. Sucking in a relieved breath, and for the first time in what feels like days, she smiles. “Well, I think that went well.”

 

Slade looks at her and despite the obvious pain he must be in, he gives her a tired smile. “I’m surprised you didn’t puke.”

 

“Oh, you’re so lucky that I didn’t throw up in your lap.” Olivia picks up the knife and goes about cleaning up after herself. 

 

“Hey, kid?” Olivia turns back, her eyebrows raised in question. “You came through for me. Thanks.”

  
Olivia smiles gently. “We’re friends,” is all she replies, the words meaning more to him that she could ever know.


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not promising anything, but I will try to get another chapter out before Christmas. As ever, thank you for the continued support and your endless patience! 
> 
> Delirious Slade is coming up next chapter folks, and he's got some interesting things to say.

It’s only a day later when he can’t control the chills and the fever that sets in thanks to an infection. Olivia isn’t the smartest girl around, but she knows this is bad despite Slade’s constant reassurances that he’s fine. It takes hours for her to convince him to let her see his wound, though she’s sure that it’s only because he’s too set in his fever to fight her anymore on the matter. It takes all of her self control not to pull a disgusted face at the sight. 

 

“What do you miss the most?” she asks, hoping to distract him.

 

Slade grunts, but otherwise he remains silent. 

 

“Of course, you miss your son. But me? I miss toothpaste. Do you know how long it’s been since I brushed my teeth? No wonder you didn’t want to kiss me.”

 

A pained noise comes from his throat. Olivia swallows tightly and busies herself with getting him water. She kneels by his makeshift bed and gently lifts his head high enough to let him drink. “You need to stay hydrated,” she says gently, pushing his hair away from his head. Slade groans at the contact and leans into her touch, relishing at the feeling of her cold hands. “Drink some more,” Olivia insists, but Slade turns his head away and spits out the water.

 

“Seriously?” 

 

“Staying hydrated isn’t my problem,” Slade snaps. “My problem is getting a bullet dug out of my shoulder with a dull blade and now it’s infected.”

 

Olivia bites her lip and wills herself not to argue back. She understands it must be hard for a strong, able man such as Slade Wilson to accept help let alone need it, and seeing him so vulnerable has scared her in a way that Fyers never could.

 

“Slade, you’re getting worse. Soon-”

 

“I’m fine.”

 

“No you’re not.” She pauses. “Listen, Yao Fei had these magic herbs. There’s probably still some left back in the cave. I can-”

 

“No.”

 

“If I don’t go you will die,” she snaps, finally losing patience with him. “Just this once will you please let me help you.” She’s met with his stubborn silence. She almost winces at the memory of his wound weeping blood and puss. Fuck him and his pride. “This isn’t going to go away and I need to stop it before it spreads. They heal anything. I’m going.”

 

“Don’t go risking yourself for me kid.”

 

Olivia clenches her jaw and wills her tears away. “And I can’t let you die,” she says softly. 

 

“Olivia,” he groans. He struggles to sit up but Olivia pushes him down with gentle hands.

 

“I’m not sorry,” she whispers, smoothing his growing hair away from his hot skin and pressing a gentle kiss to his forehead. Olivia tears herself away from him and opens the weapon chest.

 

“I’ll be fine in a few days,” Slade insists weakly. 

 

“I won’t take that chance. I can’t lose you,” Olivia replies quietly.

 

She leaves without looking back, ignoring him as he calls weakly after her.

 

\--

 

She doesn’t stop running until she gets to the cave, and it’s with a relieved breath that she finds the pouch of herbs exactly where Yao Fei left it. A rustling comes from behind her, and in a move so fast that Slade would be proud of her, Olivia stands and whirls around with her gun pointed at the intruder. 

 

“Help me!” he cries weakly. “Please!” 

 

Without lowering her gun, Olivia lets out a shaky breath. She doesn’t have time for this shit. Slade needs her. Her eyes linger on his badly beaten face, and she feels a touch of sympathy for the man. “Who are you?” she demands.

 

“My-my name is Alan. I’m a student and I was on a fishing trip with my class, and the boat caught fire - some mechanical malfunction or something I don’t know!”

 

“When?” Olivia barks.

 

“A few days ago-”

 

“Then where is everyone else? Your class, the crew?”

 

“I don’t know!” he cries. “Maybe I’m the only survivor. I-I thought that I was going to die! I managed to get to shore and I thought that I was lucky when these men found me-”

 

“Soldiers?”

 

“Yes,” he cries miserably. “They did this to me! They had masks on and they attacked me! They beat me and then left me here,” he sobs, doubling over in pain. Olivia lowers her gun. “Please, you have to help me. They could come back at any minute and kill us both.”

 

“Where did they go?” she demands coldly. “They wouldn’t just leave you here.”

 

“I-I don’t know! They got a call on the radio about another incident on the island. Please you have to believe me!” he cries hysterically. 

 

Weeks ago she would not have hesitated to cut this stranger free and lead him back to the fuselage without a second thought other than what a good person she is for helping someone. Slade would have torn her a new one, but that was worth a man’s life. 

 

But now, after months of attacks and the memory of a bullet tearing through Slade’s body fresh in her mind, she can’t trust a thing that this man says. He’s a stranger, and if all he has said is true, then at best he is a liability.

 

A liability that she can’t afford to take care of.

 

But as she looks at this beaten, whimpering man, she can see herself in him, begging Slade not to kill her. 

 

Slade gave her a chance, and perhaps she should give this man one too.

 

With an aggravated sigh, Olivia crouches down and presses the blade of her knife to the ropes binding the man’s shaking hands. She looks up and says, “I’ll cut you loose, but after that you’re on your own.” 

 

But then she looks, really looks, and she lets out a disbelieving laugh.

 

Olivia tilts her head. “I know you,” she breathes. 

 

The man flinches away from her. “What?”

 

“I know you,” she says louder, her voice turning to steel as she looks deep into this cowards eyes. “You’re one of them.”

 

The man pales slightly under his busted up face. “I don’t-”

 

“You’re one of Fyer’s men. I saw you that day when he tried to-” Olivia swallows tightly. “You stood there and did nothing.” Olivia presses the tip of the blade against his neck, smiling cruelly as blood trickles down his skin. “Tell me, if Slade hadn’t have come for me, would you have raped me along with your fellow soldiers?” 

 

The man,  _ Alan _ , balks. “N-No! I’m a student! I am not one of them, look at what they’ve done to me! Do you think that I’m some sort of trap? What kind of person are you?!”

 

“What kind of person lines up to watch a woman get smacked around? What kind of man stands with his buddies, waiting for the moment he gets to force himself on a woman? You make me  _ sick!” _ Olivia stands, tightening her grip on her gun and presses the barrel to the man’s head. “You’re lucky that I don’t have time to give you the painful death that you deserve.”

 

Something changes in Alan’s eyes. “No. Wait! Please-”

 

Olivia pulls the trigger, flinching away as the lifeless body drops at her feet. Her stomach twists as she meets his lifeless eyes. 

 

“No,” she breathes, horror overcoming her as it dawns on her what she’s done.

 

_ It was the right thing to do. She had no choice. _

 

A sob erupts from her as she backs away with shaking legs. 

  
_ What has she become? _


	14. Chapter 14

Though her lungs are begging for her to slow down, Olivia does not stop running until she reaches the fuselage. For a moment, the only sound she can hear is her heart beating furiously in her ears. Sucking in a desperate breath, she her heart sinks as she hears nothing but silence. “Slade?” Olivia croaks out, taking a tentative step towards his bed. The still form on the bed does not move.

Swallowing back a sob, Olivia rushes to his side and collapses to her knees. “Don’t you dare die on me,” she growls, as she throws the blankets off of him. “Oh thank God,” she breathes as she sees his chest moving shallowly. 

Olivia clutches the pouch of herbs desperately in her hand and forces herself to stand. Though she aches to stay by his side and hold him, she busies herself with making the tea all the while reminding herself that comforting him now is wasting time. She pours the piping hot tea into one of the steel mugs that they own and hurries back to his side. 

Gently placing the tea on the floor, Olivia places her hand on his cheek and calls out his name. When he does not wake, she shakes him gently. 

“Olivia,” he groans, blindly clutching onto her hand. His grip is surprisingly strong considering his current state. Olivia squeezes his hand as she pushes back his sweat soaked hair.

“I’m here,” she says softly, willing herself not to lose it just yet. With a slight tremble in her hand, she picks up the mug. “I need you to drink this for me.”

“I’m sorry,” Slade rasps, his hand clutching onto hers tightly. 

“For what?”

“For not telling you how I really feel,” he says thickly. 

Tears sting her eyes. “Slade, please just drink-”

“You deserve so much more than me and this place.” He struggles to sit up, and Olivia pushes him back down. His eyes focus on her, and they look so dark against his pale skin. With a trembling hand Slade touches her cheek. Despite the urgency of the situation, Olivia leans into his touch, his burning hot skin warming her cool skin. “The moment you stepped into the fuselage, I knew that you would change everything.”

“Slade,” Olivia begs, her voice trembling. “We don’t have time for this.” His eyes start to slide shut. “Hey!” Olivia slaps him gently on the cheek, but there’s no response.

Unable to bear it any longer, Olivia swears softly and decides enough is enough. She slaps him harder, her heart soaring as his eyes struggle to focus on her. Olivia struggle to lift his head. “Drink this and you will feel better, I promise,” Olivia says gently. With a trembling hand she puts the mug to his mouth and slowly tilts it for him to drink.

Only when she feels him swallow does Olivia allow herself to cry.

\--

“It tastes like an ashtray, but it gets the job done.”

Olivia forces a smile as she tries not to stare at his bare chest. It’s astonishing how quickly his coloring has returned, and though he still groans as he sits up, he looks better than what he has in days. His wound is already healing, the infection gone. It’s only been a few hours, and though she has first hand experience with Yao Fei’s magic tea, Olivia bites her tongue to tell him to slow down as he sits up and places his feet on the floor. She can’t help but worry with the memory of his labored breath and his pained groans so fresh in her mind. 

But so are the words that he had rasped to her as he struggled to catch his breath. They are teetering on the edge of something, and she has wanted to take the fall with him for weeks, but there’s only so much she can do alone if he’s unwilling to fall with her. 

It was nothing but a fever dream, she tells herself. He was alone and scared and he clung onto the only person who knows him. He probably didn’t even remember what was said. Tears prick her eyes. Olivia turns away from him, eager to be left alone with her thoughts and her nightmares after the colossal fuck up these past three days have been.

“Hey kid,” Slade calls. Olivia turns back, struggling to grasp a hold on her emotions. Those dark eyes are a total mystery as he stares at her in a way she cannot name. “You didn’t run into any trouble out there, did you?”

She looks away. “No. Nothing happened.”

“Kid?” 

Olivia bites her lip. She considers lying but he knows her far too well and will only call her out on her bullshit. Those dark eyes stare at her patiently and she’s opening her mouth and telling him before she consciously makes the decision to do so.

“T..There was a man, in the cave,” Olivia starts off hesitatingly. “H-he said that he was a student, that he washed up on the island after his boat caught fire and he had been captured by Fyer’s men. He escaped and I didn't know what to do! He was so pathetic, pleading with me to help him and begging for a chance. He had been tortured Slade, just like me. That was me! Until you taught me to fight, that’s how I got by. I begged and bartered with anyone who had the power to protect me.” 

Unable to meet Slade’s intense gaze any longer, Olivia averts her eyes and swallows tightly, her throat suddenly like sand paper. “I was going to untie him, just to give him a chance you know? I wasn't going to bring him back here. I knew that there was a chance that he was lying, but it seemed like the right thing to do. It sounds so stupid now. But when I got close to him, when I really looked at him, I recognised him. He was there! H-he just stood there when Fyer's touched me. He would have r-raped me if given the chance! I was so mad and I just lost it!” 

She sniffles. “I shot him. I didn't even think twice about it.”

By the end she’s too ashamed to look him in the eye any longer. Self hatred claws at her skin.

“Kid. Olivia, look at me.” It takes a few seconds for her to gather up the courage to do so, but when she does she doesn’t see any of the disgust or hatred in his eyes that she expected to. Instead she sees understanding, and a few things that she can’t possibly read in that impenetrable gaze of his. 

“We do what we have to to survive. Don’t ever feel guilt over that. That man deserved far worse than death.”

“I shot an unarmed man in cold blood,” Olivia whispers. “That’s not survival. That’s murder.”

Slade pushes himself up with a grunt and it takes all of her self control not to step back at his closeness. “Maybe it is murder. But that man would have killed you the moment he had the opportunity to. It’s better to be alive and feel remorse than dead and have a clear conscience.”

“How do you cope with it?” Olivia demands tiredly. “I don’t know how-”

“Kid,” he soothes, his voice uncharacteristically gentle. He leans towards her and places a steady hand on her shoulder. “You live with it. It’s shit advice, but it’s all I’ve got.”

Slade holds her tearful gaze and she has to bite her lip to stop it from trembling. “You scared the shit out of me,” Olivia whispers, swiping at her cheek when a tear falls. She’s way too exhausted to give a shit about being weak in front of him anymore. The only thing that matters is that he’s alright.

Slade puts a gentle hand on the curve of her waist and slowly bends his head and kisses her forehead. She almost reels back in shock. It’s such an innocent gesture, yet a flare of heat courses through her. “I'm alright,” he says, his voice a tired husk. He goes to move back but Olivia catches his wrist. 

“Please stop fighting this,” she whispers, her voice filled with torment. 

“Olivia stop-”

“I _can’t_ ,” she breathes.

“You shouldn’t want me. I’m not a good man Olivia.”

There is an electric current between them and it’s something she has never experienced in her life. How can he possibly fight this? “I don’t want anyone else, I want you.” Olivia places a hand on his cheek. “Tell me that this feels wrong. Tell me that you don’t feel something for me too and I won’t ever mention this again.”

With no warning, Slade reaches for her and pulls her into his arms, hard and fast and tight against his body. Olivia slides her arms around him and eagerly presses herself into his embrace. His arms are warm and strong on her back as they slide under the thin material of her shirt, slowly travelling up her spine. Olivia shivers. Pulling back, she looks up into Slade’s torn face and softly says, “I don’t want to fight to survive anymore. I want to fight to live.”


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is pure porn. If that's not your thing, you're free to skip this chapter, but to be honest this story is about to become pretty smutty.

The indecision is clear on Slade’s face and it makes Olivia want to groan in frustration. She’s so tired of his stubbornness and this fucked up dance that they have been doing for weeks. She wants him, and she knows that he wants her too. 

It’s simple.

Olivia holds his gaze as she drops her arms. Slade’s face remains stoic, though before he can take a step back, Olivia places her her hand on his bare chest. Her eyes linger on his bandaged shoulder and briefly wonders if this is the best course of action whilst he is injured, but she can’t go back now. His stubbornness to do the right thing and her irrational actions are what led to him being shot in the first place.

Talking hasn’t solved anything. But this might.

Other than a slight intake of breath, Slade remains still, his blazing eyes fixed on hers. His heart is thumping wildly against the palm of her hand. Nerves flutter in her belly as she slowly drags her hand down his chest, her nails scraping at his skin. Pausing at the button of his cargo pants, Olivia wills for him not to push her away.

He doesn’t.

She doesn’t blink as she drops her hand down lower and cups him through his pants. Slade sucks in a ragged breath, his eyes heating up in a way that has her breath hitching in her throat. Slade tightens his hands on her waist and leans further into her, resting the scruff of his cheek against hers. His mouth is almost against her ear, his uneven breath gently tickling her skin.

Olivia fumbles between them and gives a silent cry of victory as she finally manages to unbutton his pants. She feels his sharp intake of breath against her neck as she pulls his cock free and slides her hand along the thick length of him. With a low growl in his throat, Slade lifts her head and grips her cheeks roughly in his hands as he smashes his mouth down upon hers. Slade dips her head back and finally takes control, his tongue slipping inside and she moans, her hand tightening around his cock earning her a throaty sound of satisfaction. 

Slade kisses the way that he charges into battle, determined and deep and with a finesse that is both graceful and deadly. She is consumed by him. Olivia slowly runs the pads of her fingers up and down his shaft before gripping the base of his cock and tightening her fist over the hot flesh. Slade rocks his hips and gasps against her mouth. A strong hand wraps itself in her long hair and tugs her head back sharply, exposing her vulnerable neck to Slade’s hungry lips. Olivia lets go of his cock, not caring that everything is rushed and desperate, only caring that it is happening and that she finally-finally gets to touch and be touched by him. 

Slade lifts her shirt up and over her head, his keen eyes taking in every inch of her exposed skin as she slides off her bra. He kisses her again, his teeth nipping at her lips as a hand sneaks up and palms her breast. Olivia whines as his rough palm rubs against her sensitive nipple, squeezing the supple flesh before he makes an impatient noise in the back of his throat.

Olivia squeaks in surprise as he roughly picks her up and settles her against the weapons chest, his erection trapped firmly against her stomach. With eager hands Olivia pushes his pants down as far as she can, her hands clutching onto the firm muscle of his ass and pulling him towards her. She captures his mouth once more but the searing kiss is brief as Slade wrenches himself away and nips down her neck, his lips lingering on her collarbones until-

“Oh,” Olivia breathes, her entire body arching as he brushes his tongue against the tight clench of her nipple followed by a gentle bite as he catches her nipple between his teeth and tugs. She watches with heavy eyes as Slade drops to his knees, his lips kissing her belly as he pops open the button of her worn jeans and slowly slides them down her legs. Olivia threads her fingers through his hair as he mouths at her hips, the palms of his hands sliding back up her legs. She parts her legs on instinct as his kisses move lower until they are pressed against her panties, and she wants so badly for him to press his mouth there, to taste her and to come against his mouth. His fingers hook over her panties and he swiftly slides them down her legs. His eyes flick up at her as he cups her cunt, finding that she is plenty wet enough for him already.

With only a few swipes of his thumb against her clit, Olivia is crying out, desperate for more but Slade stands abruptly, his strong hands lifting her easily despite his injury and dropping her onto his cot. Olivia lies back and spreads her legs for him as Slade kneels above her. Eyes locked firmly on hers, Slade takes his cock in his hand and strokes himself a few times. Olivia stares, the sight captivating her. His eyes flick down to her spread legs and he slowly rubs the head of his cock against her aching cunt. Olivia hisses and reaches for him only for Slade to push her back down, his now black eyes sending her a firm warning to stay down. With a frustrated growl Olivia listens and curls her fingers into the blanket to stop herself. 

She wants him, needs him in a way that no drug could ever compare. 

“Take me,” she begs in a breathless whisper, unable to cope with his endless torture any longer.

He props himself on his elbows so as not to crush her with his weight. His brown eyes darken to black, and she can see her own reflection in them this close up. 

“As you wish,” Slade breathes against her mouth before slowly - so achingly slowly as though begging her one last time to put a stop to this - presses inside of her inch by inch.

Olivia is unable to swallow back a moan, fingernails digging into his broad shoulders at the delicious burn. There have been men - boys compared to Slade - but God it has been such a long time. Everyone of them had been nothing more than a momentary diversion, a useful way to scratch an itch or to entertain her for a night. But this, being with Slade, is so terrifyingly different. She has always been so careful with her heart, but with every annoyed sigh, every amused glance and every lingering touch, her carefully constructed walls crumbled to dust until she found herself here, gasping for breath beneath him, her heart and body welcoming him.

She loves him. It’s simple and terrifying and beautiful.

The way he’s looking down at her shifts something inside of her. He’s braced over her so carefully, his weight resting on his straining arms, his dark eyes ablaze in desire. Olivia drags her fingers up into Slade’s dark hair and kisses him hard. She wraps her legs around his waist and pulls his pelvis towards hers until they are locked together without a single inch separating them. She arches against him, pulling him closer as one of her hands rakes fingernails down his spine.

“Slade,” Olivia purrs, shuddering as his hips hitch forward as he slowly bottoms out inside of her causing the most delicious pleasure she’s ever known bloom hot in her belly. Her breath comes in quick pants and her limbs feel heavy after this long day, but her heart and her cunt are aching for him to take her already. That penetrating gaze of his is fixed firmly on her face, and even now joined as they are, she still cannot possibly guess what is going through that brilliant mind of his. Olivia smooths a hand across his cheek and brushes back an errant lock of hair that threatens to fall into his eyes. Biting her lip, Olivia hitches her hips up and smirks at the growl that rumbles from Slade’s throat in response.

“Take me,” Olivia demands throatily once more. She grips her fingers in his hair and tugs hard, crying out as Slade pushes his cock deep and hard inside of her. His hips slam against hers as he fucks her, so intense and so unrestrained - like everything she imagined and yet more than she could ever possibly handle.

Slade shifts up onto his knees suddenly and sits back on his heels, his fingers digging into her hot flesh as he catches her hips and drags her up with him. The new position has her crying out as he sinks into her deeper, his thrusts giving her no mercy as he fucks up into her, his cock pushing deep and hard inside of her. Her breasts pressed tight against his chest, the slick glide of their bodies, the feel of his naked skin against hers, the unbearable pleasure with each glide of his cock - it’s all too much. Olivia bares her hips down and is swept away in a pleasure unlike anything she has ever known. One hand grips his hair and tilts his head back, forcing him to look at her, to have him witness the pleasure that only he has ever given her.

Watching herself in the reflection of his eyes, she has never felt more beautiful as she does now. Olivia catches his mouth in a lingering kiss, her long hair falling around them and closing them off from the rest of the world. His hands are everywhere, tracing the curve of her waist, travelling up and down her spine, gripping onto the soft skin of her ass. Olivia’s breath catches on a broken cry when Slade thrusts into her again and again, his pace unrelenting. Her nails drag against the working muscles of his back, her cunt fluttering around his shaft.

“Look at you,” Slade breathes, his thrusts falling into a natural rhythm as though sensing how close she is to orgasm. Torn between wanting that sweet release and never wanting this moment to end, Olivia clings to him. She presses her face into the crook of his neck and cries out his name. His calloused and self-assured fingers press between the join of their bodies and finds the swollen nub of her clit. Olivia jerks up, gasping at the intense pleasure that is all too much - the steady press of his fingers and every glide of his cock, the filthy sounds, the harsh pants of their breaths-

“Fuck,” Olivia keens, head falling back as Slade drags a knuckles across the ache of her clit, knees clenching tight around his thighs. Slade laughs in her ear and grabs her by the waist, holding her hard and still as he fucks her, the slap of their bodies drowning out her guttural cries. Slade lifts his free hand and sinks his fingers into the tangle of her hair and tugs her head back so she can look him in the eye. Those dark, beautiful eyes, blown wide with arousal focus firmly on her like she is the only woman in the world. Olivia gasps in a panting breath and catches his face between her hands. 

“I love you,” Olivia says quietly, gasping as he thrusts deeper. She does not look away as something in Slade’s expression shifts, the clench of his jaw tightening even further at her words. Slade presses a lingering kiss to her lips, and though she has no idea what he could possibly be thinking, she can’t bring herself to regret her words.

She’s tired of fighting just for a chance to make it back home to her family. She wants more. She wants him, a life tangled in his arms whether that’s in Starling City or somewhere else. She can live out her days on this island if she has to, just so long as he is by her side.

“Oh!” Olivia jerks, heat pulses through her as Slade holds her tight and carries her through the trembling ache. His nimble fingers on her clit become rougher, his thrusts almost sloppy as she feels him lose control, unraveling in his need and it’s all too much for her. Her body pulls taut, her breath lost on a keening gasp as each wave crashes over her again and again. Slade shifts quickly, catching her as she falls into his chest.

His movements are frantic, thrusts erratic as he drags slick fingers from the heat of her cunt and curls his fingers into the curve of her ass. Olivia clings to him, boneless and sated, thighs spread wide open in welcome as he surges towards his own orgasm.

Clenching her cunt around his cock, Olivia smiles tiredly at the groan that erupts from his mouth. She tangles her fingers in his messy hair and drags him up for a wet kiss, all hunger and slick drags of tongue and desperate moans as his cock drives into her again and again, his thrusts wild and needy, the sound of skin on skin obscene in the quiet of the fuselage.

Slade cries out into her mouth, his hands tightening around her ass as he holds her down on his cock as he comes. His whole body trembles with the ferocity of it, muscles standing out in hard relief, hips pressed tight against hers. She can feel every inch of him deep inside of her, filling her. It’s unlike anything she has ever experienced, and she does not regret a moment of it. 

“Slade,” Olivia murmurs against his lips, stroking her fingers through his hair, holding him against her as he jerks through the aftershocks. He makes a noise deep in his chest as he slowly relaxes against her, his arms tightening around her as he presses a soft kiss to her lips.


	16. Chapter 16

His heart is pounding erratically in his chest as he struggles to wrap his head around what’s just happened.

Slade lies back slowly, his body completely spent. His shoulder is throbbing and his head is all over the place. It has been a long time since he has had a woman, and it has been even longer since he has had a woman that he cares for. Olivia curls into him, her soft breasts pressing into his side as he wraps an arm around her and pulls her closer. She throws a leg over his and pushes her pelvis against his thigh, and he has to suck in a sharp breath as he feels the evidence of their coupling. 

He has no idea how long they lie there, each too wrapped up in one another to consider breaking the silence. It feels as though a weight has been lifted off of his chest now that he has finally allowed himself to give into this thing between them. Olivia is not the naive girl who stumbled into his life all of those months ago. She’s strong and brave, and has a heart that sees the goodness in the darkest of people. 

It twists something deep in the pit of his stomach that he once considered killing her.

She’s a pain in his ass, but he wouldn’t change her for the world.

Eventually Olivia grinds her hip down against his thigh, and he knows that the time for contemplation is over. Swallowing back a groan at the wet heat of her cunt against his skin, Slade tightens his hold on her but it’s no use as Olivia sits up and straddles his hips. Slade sucks in a breath and he raises his hands to trace the curve of her waist with the intention of stopping her, his his traitorous hands slowly travel down and cups her pert ass. 

Olivia gives him that small amused smile that makes his head spin and bites her lip as she bares her hips down. They are both breathing hard as she runs her hands down his chest and across his stomach. Her eyes leave his face, curiously watching her fingers trace every scar on his body as she explores the map of his skin. Her eyes tighten on the healing bullet wound on his shoulder. He squeezes her thigh in gratitude, because no words can ever express how grateful he is that she ignored his words and saved his life.

Slade clenches his jaw and fights for control as she slowly leans down, her long hair closing them off from the rest of the world. Despite himself, Slade can’t help it when his eyes flick down to her breasts. His hands wander up her hips of his own accord, but he catches himself and tightens them around her hips. He aches to cup her breasts, to take a nipple into his mouth and lavish her in the way that she desveres. He looks up at her then and the heat that is coming from her eyes makes him want to squirm, and then they are kissing again. He is not a young man by any means, yet his body responds quickly to Olivia Queen as his hardening cock quickly proves. The groan that tears from his throat is one of desperation as she slides her slick cunt against his cock and it’s all too fucking much-

“Olivia,” he groans, his hands tightening on her hips to stop her. “No.”

“Yes,” she hisses, baring her hips down as the tip of his cock enters her. 

“We can’t,” Slade grounds out, his jaw clenching as he struggles not to let her sink down. He can endure days of torture by the most brutal methods known to mankind, yet it is no greater torture than to say those words. The memory of being buried inside of her is painfully fresh in his memory, and the thought of it not happening again is painful.

Olivia pauses. She looks down at him incredulously as she sits up. “What?”

“It was a mistake. Forgive me. It can’t happen again.” Olivia flinches at his words and sucks in a shuddering breath as he wraps his hand around her thigh and gently squeezes. His brow furrows as she looks away from him and shakes her head slightly.

She closes her eyes to hide her tears, but Slade catches sight of them and curses himself for his words. He is a man of action, not of words. But the sight of her face crumpling has him quickly sitting up despite the pain of his shoulder and cupping her face in his hands as she moves to get off of him. He swallows back his unease and growls, “You think that I have changed my mind about this?” She still doesn’t look at him. Swallowing back his impatience, he reminds himself what loving a man such as he is like and despite her past and everything she has overcome, Olivia is still young. 

So Slade runs his thumbs across her cheeks and swipes her tears away with a gentleness that surprises himself and presses a lingering kiss to her lips. “I cannot let you go, not now that I have had you.”

Olivia slowly opens her eyes which are still swimming with tears. “Then why-”

“Do you truly wish to add a pregnancy into all of this?” he demands softly.

He is not a man to soften reality, not even for Olivia. But she deserves more credit than what he gives her. It pulls her up short for a moment. With a soft curse, Olivia rolls her tear filled eyes. Despite the situation Slade finds himself fighting back a smile at her insolence. 

“It’s simple. Pull out before you come.”

Slade raises an eyebrow. “Kid, I don’t know what Sex Ed is like over in the US, but pulling out isn’t exactly the best birth control.”

It pulls a smile out of her and Slade finds himself smiling stupidly back at her. He’s an idiot for letting himself fall for this girl. It goes against everything he should be doing to get back to his son and yet having her in his arms is the happiest he has been in years. Her smart mouth and her growing strength has slowly captured his heart.

He thinks of his son and though the pain of not being by his side is still there, with Olivia at his side it’s a little more bearable. 

Olivia huffs above him and though her eyes are a little red and her hair is a mess, she is still the most beautiful woman in his world. She gives him a wicked smile. “Well, I’m willing to risk it if you are.”

And damn him, for a moment he is tempted to push her back onto the welter of blankets and bury himself inside of her until all of their troubles go away. But he’s been burned too many times by taking unnecessary risks and this isn’t something he can bring himself to gamble on.

“We can’t,” he repeats sternly. She opens her mouth to protest, but Slade presses his thumb to her lips to cut her off. “We can’t have sex. I won’t risk it. But we can do other things,” he says suggestively, smirking as her indignant eyes light up in interest.


	17. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i suck. seriously.

It’s terrifying how someone’s life can change in a matter of hours. Oliva is not a stranger to that, but it's never been for the better. A week ago her days were spent training and hunting for food, topped off with the stress of dodging mercenaries and dealing with her pesky feelings for Slade. Now she spends her days in a cloud of pleasure as Slade’s new mission seems to be discovering what makes her tick, and judging by the ghost of a smirk on his lips each time he has her crying out and clutching onto him as he brings her to orgasm, he’s thoroughly enjoying his new mission.

Not wanting to be outdone by the gruff Slade Wilson of all people, Olivia of course makes it her own mission to reciprocate. She traces every scar and every freckle with her fingertips and her lips as she explores his skin, relishing in every groan and the tightening of his fingers in her hair that he seems to be fond of wrapping around his hand. Her greatest joy in life right now is seeing the stoic Slade Wilson come apart and lose control because of her.

Still, Slade has some control over his actions, because despite her best efforts to persuade him, Slade won’t have sex with her again. She is not a fool, and despite the risk that it poses, she wants almost nothing more than to have him inside of her again. Plus she’s pretty sure that even she is unlucky enough to end up stranded on an island filled with men intent on killing her and end up knocked up. But Slade is unwilling to take the chance.

“You might not be that unlucky kid,” he’d said as he trailed his lips down her stomach. “But I am.”

They don’t leave the fuselage for days, and it’s one of the happiest times of her life.

Still, they’re running low on food, and despite her wishes to stay in their private little bubble, they need to hunt. When she wakes that morning, she makes to get out the bed but Slade pulls her back and pulls her tightly against him. He hums against her sleepily and presses his face against her shoulder. “Morning,” he rumbles, pulling her impossibly tighter against him. He pushes his hips against her backside, and she wants nothing more than to press her hips back and let his erection slide into her, but she resists. 

“Morning,” she replies gently. Catching the hand sliding down her stomach, she twines her fingers in his and lifts their joined hands to press a kiss to the back of his. “We’re running low on food,” she reminds him. He ignores her, his mouth caressing the tender skin of her neck causing her to shiver. 

“Slade,” she warns, though she makes no move to push him away. “Seriously, we need to hunt.” With an indignant huff, Slade pulls his mouth away. 

“Since when do you offer to hunt kid?” Slade grumbles, flipping over onto his back.

“Since we won’t have any food left if we don’t go out today.” There’s an uncommitted grunt behind her, so Olivia rolls over and straddles him. She runs her hands down his chest, her fingers tracing his tanned skin as she tries to coax him out of bed. “Come on. The sooner we do it the sooner we can come back.”

“Not yet,” he says, his hands framing her hips as his sleepy eyes take her in. 

She has never been a modest person, and despite the new scars that have ruined her once perfect skin, Slade does not look at them with disdain. Dark eyes linger on the scars left from the torture Wintergreen inflicted upon her, and when they flick back to hers, she does not see the pity or anger that she had expected. She sees pride.

In fact, the way he’s looking up at her right now, she’s pretty sure it makes her all the more attractive to him. He makes her feel beautiful, even despite her current lack of grooming. Olivia Queen has always been beautiful, it is something she has known back when she was a teenager and naively thought that beauty meant something. There has been a long trail of men who have told her how beautiful she is, but it is the first time in her life that another human beings reaction to her body has mattered to her.

Olivia smiles down at him and leans down to press a soft kiss to his lips. Slade tries to deepen it but Olivia pulls back with a teasing smile and pushes him down firmly as he tries to sit up. Smile widening, Olivia sits up and grinds down along Slade’s hard erection. The answering groan he gives is delicious. Strong hands land on Olivia’s hips and tighten in warning as she goes to do it again.

Olivia rolls her eyes at Slade who looks torn between want and frustration. “I wasn’t going to-”

“Olivia,” Slade warns. 

Sighing in exasperation, Olivia bends down and presses a quick, hard kiss to his lips. His hips buck up instinctively, and Olivia relishes in the feel of him against her. “Is it do bad that I want to feel you against the place I want you most?” she whispers, her voice breaking as she bares her hips down once more. She doesn’t give him chance to answer as she places her hands on his shoulder and pushes up.

Slade let’s out a pained hiss between clenched teeth. “Crap!” Olivia says, quickly moving her hand. “I’m so sorry! Are you alright?” Panicking, Olivia’s eyes flick down to his wounded shoulder. With gentle fingers, Olivia runs her fingers over the puckered skin of his gunshot wound. 

“I’m fine-”

“No you’re not! I’m so stupid I didn’t think and I got carried away-”

“Olivia,” Slade interrupts, amusement and irritation clouding his eyes. “I’m fine. That magic tea isn't half bad,” he rumbles as he pulls her down and captures his lips.

Olivia makes to pull away but Slade’s hand wraps around her braid and curls it into his fist. She can’t move even if she wants to. “But your shoulder-,” 

“Is fine,” Slade insists. Olivia makes to argue but she is helpless as Slade claims her mouth once more, but the mood is gone and she’s desperately hungry, so with a sigh she pulls away as Slade releases his grip on her hair. Olivia shakes her hair free from her braid, allowing the blond waves to flow down her back and arms, framing them both as she leans back down to place a kiss on his lips. 

Slade fingers the soft tresses. “Your hair’s too long. It’s impractical.”

Olivia sighs. “I don’t exactly see a salon around, do you? Besides, I thought that you loved my hair.”

“I have a knife.”

She pulls back then and sternly replies, “Your knife is not going anywhere near my hair.”

He smiles, and damn, it takes her breath away at how free and unburdened he looks. Still, her belly is calling out for food, so she pushes her raging labido aside and kisses him hard. “Hunting. Now.” Slade tries to catch her, but Olivia is too quick as she darts from his reaching hands and is on the other side of the fuselage before he can even sit up.

She pulls on her worn jeans and turns around as she’s fastening the button to see him watching her with bright eyes. She smiles at him, feeling happier than she has in a very long time. And judging by the answering smile Slade gives her, she’s pretty sure that the feeling is mutual.


	18. Chapter 18

Life on the island carries on. Mercenaries still patrol the island, Fyers still has a plan and Yao Fei is right in the middle of it all. Everyday is still a fight for survival and she is still well aware that at any moment that they could be killed. 

But things are different now.

Slade was worried about a romantic relationship being a distraction from their ultimate goal. But he was wrong. If anything it makes her work harder because she has something else to live for other than a goal which sometimes seems impossible. She fights for  _ him _ now and a future for them that she had never thought possible.

Despite the change in their relationship, Slade still makes her train. He kicks her ass more times than she can count but she does manage to best him a few times. It turns out that getting off doesn’t make Slade pull his punches - it makes him hit harder. 

She pulls him up on it one day after her aching body feels as though she’s been hit by a bus. She all but collapses onto her cot with a groan as she waits for his usual bullshit response of how he needs a soldier and not a whining party princess. Instead Slade’s deathly silent for such a long time she sits up to check that he’s still there. Slowly stripping himself of his gear until he’s clad in a clean vest and cargo pants, his dark eyes are solemn when he eventually looks at her and answers.

“I keep my promises kid. If I die-”

“Stop it,” Olivia snaps, unwilling to even imagine it. She forces herself to her feet despite her protesting limbs, ignoring Slade’s hard eyes as they track her every move.

“-at least you will have some skills to see yourself safe,” he finishes.

“We are both going home,” she snaps, ignoring the pricking of her eyes as she whirls around to face him. She’s being irrational and stupidly naive, even  _ she _ knows that. Though it’s something they haven’t said out loud in a long time, they both know that there’s a good chance that they could die at any given moment despite how much Slade trains her or how hard they fight for one another.

One of her biggest fears is being alone on this wretched place. But it’s just not the thought of only having herself to rely on that scares her. It’s the thought that she won’t have  _ Slade. _ With the memory of his deathly pale skin and his labored breaths still fresh in her mind despite the weeks that have passed since he was shot, there is no way in hell she can even stand to think about-

Slade clenches his jaw, no doubt holding back words that are bound to hurt her. “I’m being realistic here,” he says stiffly.

Olivia laughs bitterly. “What happened to the man that would have killed me without a moment of hesitation if he deemed me a risk to his survival?”

She wishes she could take the words back immediately, but it’s too late. Slade goes deathly still and looks at her with an intensity that scares the living daylights out of her. Olivia looks away in shame and feeling every bit the brat that Slade accuses her of being. 

Moving so quickly and suddenly, Slade is right in front of her, his strong hands framing her face and forcing her to look at him. “You want to know what happened to that man?” Slade says, his tone as cold as his gaze. “Olivia Queen happened. You wormed your way into my head, into my heart and any thought of  _ my  _ survival became insignificant in comparison to yours.” He stares down at her, his intense gaze penetrating her down to the very marrow of her bones.

She wants to argue that he’s being ridiculous, but no words come out. What is someone even meant to say when a man who has spent years squashing his feelings basically tells you he’s willing to die for you? 

She has forced herself to not push him when it comes to revealing his feelings, and though she admitted her love for him once, she won’t push it onto him again with this thing between them being so new and fragile.

She loves him. She loves him more than he can possibly fathom and that’s why she will never,  _ ever _ let him die for her-

Slade swears under his breath and wrenches himself away from her with a ferocity that has her cringing away from him. “Slade,” Olivia whispers as he backs away from her.

“Forget it,” he growls, turning away and heading for the door. Olivia stares at his retreating form, her heart pounding in her chest wildly as she realises what her silence has cost her. 

She’s such a fucking idiot.

Stumbling after him, Olivia catches herself herself on the doorway before she can fall over. “Slade!” she shouts just as he’s about to disappear into the forest. “I’m sorry,” Olivia calls after him.

If he hears her, he doesn’t turn back.

It’s their first fight. 

But it won’t be their last.

\--

The sound of his familiar footsteps wake her from her fitful slumber hours later. He’s been gone for hours and though she ached to go and find him, she knew that she would just end up getting lost in the dark and just cause further trouble. So instead she crawled into Slade’s bed and allowed herself to have a pitiful cry until she fell asleep.

He strips out of his clothes and crawls into bed behind her, his cold body pressing up against hers causing her to shiver. A strong arm wraps around her belly and pulls her impossibly tight against his chest. Swallowing back tears, Olivia threads her fingers through his and brings their joined hands to her lips to kiss his cold hand. 

After a long while of nothing but the sound of their intermingled breathes, Slade says softly, “I have spent a very long time trying to get back to my son.” 

Olivia forces herself to remain silent despite all of the questions that are on the tip of her tongue. She can count the number times Slade has spoken about his son on one hand, and although she wants to know more about the man who has captured her heart, now isn’t the time. Neither have really spoken about  _ before,  _ and a part of her is selfishly terrified that he will be reminded that he had a life before her with a family that she has no part of.

His hand slides down her side, his skilled fingers tracing the curve of her waist. His breath ghosts her ear as he says, “I wasn’t the best father. I wasn’t around much for the boy. He thought that I was a pilot and he looked up to me. He would be ashamed if he knew the truth.”

“That’s not true,” Olivia murmurs, squeezing his hand tightly in comfort. “What’s his name?” she asks tentatively. 

After a long pause, Slade lets out a shaky breath and replies, “Joe.”

“And what of his mother?” Olivia asks gently, half afraid of his answer.

“I’m not married anymore if that is what you are asking. Adeline hated that I was always traveling with work. She hated what I am. We split up many years ago.”

Olivia turns to face him, her eyes struggling to see his expression in the dark as he leans over her. “I shouldn’t have left you before,” he says, his hand cupping her face firmly. “For two years I have thought about nothing more than getting back to him. Every decision I made was made for my son. And then one day, this girl stumbles into my life and turns everything upside down. I no longer just think about getting back home to my boy. Now I think about having you by my side when I finally do.” His voice dips as he says, “I’m not used to caring for anyone other than my son.”

Olivia threads her fingers through his hair and says softly, “Nothing will stop you from going home to your son. Not even me.” Slade tries to protest but Olivia shushes him. “He comes first,” she says firmly. She drags him down to her and kisses him.

“I’m sorry for being a brat,” she breathes against his lips.

“I’m sorry for running away,” he replies softly, a small grin tugging at his mouth.

“No more talk of death,” Olivia says with a grim determination. “We protect each other just like always, and we will get through this.”

Slade lays down next to her, his face inches from her own as those dark eyes look at her as though he knows her inside and out. “I hope so Kid,” he says softly.


End file.
